Most of us go to bed at night with the same thought.

“Now – what did I do today that was productive?”

It is as though we have to justify our being on the planet by doing – doing – doing.  Busy – busy – busy.

What’s wrong with doing nothing?

Nothing.  But, can we stand the guilt?

Julia Cameron in her wonderful book, The Artist’s Way, says we actually have to book a date with ourselves every week.  That date could be taking ourselves to a museum or spending the day with a friend shopping.  Or, doing nothing.

Putting on the TV to On-Demand and watching reruns of Sex and the City or old movies.  Getting around to all those Saturday Reviews piled up next to your chair and leisurely reading them.  Or, attend your child’s play at school for an hour without looking at your watch.

You do not check your email.  (Well, maybe once at the end of the day)  You do not answer the phone.  You have caller ID and voice mail so you can just see if it is someone who may have an emergency but if they do they will call you back ten times until you answer.

It is your day. Or, at least a full half day. And it probably will be the most productive of the week.  You can think for a change without any interruptions.  You can experience “A-hah” moments and get new ideas because there is nothing intruding on your thoughts.  Nobody is gobbling up your mind with their demands and problems.  You are spending time with your most important person.  Yourself.

You can make decisions for the world.  Well, maybe not the world but you can decide if you should buy a new couch or a dishwasher.

The day must be etched in stone.  It is down in your appointment book and barring a crisis in our family or business, you keep the date. You are your own most important client.  Perhaps it is every Wednesday or Friday.  You decide which day is best.

Saturdays and Sundays do not count.  There is little we can do in our business on the weekend. We usually fill those days with errands and laundry. We keep the date with ourselves during the week.

The reason that we find it so hard to allow free time for ourselves is tied up in our self-worth.  Deep down, we really don’t think we deserve it.  I would love to know where that came from.  Who instilled that crazy ethic that we cannot be idle?   Deepak Chopra, the famous author, says we are “not human beings we are human doings.”

It is also about control.  I had a friend who suggested that we should form a 10-step Control Anonymous group.  Somehow, we feel if we let down for one minute the world will not go on without our input.  Our business and our families will just fall apart.

And yet, there have been times when we’ve had the flu and we were laid up for a week and somehow life just continued to tick on and things got done later that were urgent.

My late husband had the theory down.  He was a stockbroker and he took a month off in the winter every year.  When his clients protested he would say, “Look, pretend I just had a heart attack.  You’d be very sympathetic.  This is my yearly heart attack.”  He never lost a client.  They survived with his assistant during that month.  And he never called the office to see what was going on.  He never checked the Dow once during that month.

He has been gone from this world for years now.

Why did it take me so long to learn from him?

How long is it going to take you?