THE ACCIDENTAL WIDOWS FORUM – a miracle

You never know where your words will go.

Over a year ago, I wrote an article called When Your Husband Has Died – A Survival Guide

I expected a few widows would find it but I didn’t know how since I had so few readers at the time.

But they did.

The article began -

The funeral was beautiful. I think my husband would have been pleased.

Everyone had been so kind and supportive. The house full of loving people, food being delivered and family and friends so willing to help in any way.

My husband had been ill for five long years and the end was terrible. He had gone from about 200 pounds down to 70 pounds and was living in pain in spite of morphine and a cocktail of many narcotics. During the last week of his life I was praying that God would take him. So, when he died, at home, with all the family around him, I was grateful that it was peaceful and finally over for him. All I felt is relief. I had already grieved for five years and I thought that was the end of it. I didn’t know it was a new beginning.

It has become my most read post.  To date, there are over 800 comments.  From widows in their thirties with small children to older women.

It is now no longer my article.  It has become a forum and belongs to them.  They tell their sad stories – most are painful to read – and they encourage each other with comfort and advice.  The early commentators keep coming back and update the others with their progress.  Many mention that it is a place they can talk freely since they are using their first names and no one knows who they are or where they live.  They can share without burdening their families and friends.

It reminds me that every action has a reaction – and often one that you never expected.  This article feels like an accidental miracle to me.  I never expected to be a part of it.

There is a quote from A Course in Miracles that sums it up -

A miracle is never lost. It may touch many people you have never even met, and produced undreamed of changes in situations of which you are not even aware. (T,6)

You may be performing a miracle today with a simple action.  It could be as small as a kind word to your postal carrier.

Following the idea that love and joy can only extend, maybe that person would feel a little extra love that they would have  patience while someone looked for a stamp, a woman who had had a fight with her husband and called to apologize which cause him to be kinder to an irate customer, which would inspire that person to stop after work to visit his mom -

Love has a domino effect.  Just think.  You can change the world by loving your mail carrier for a minute.

When I wrote that article I thought not many would read, I now feel that I was being used as an unaware Guardian Angel. It is very humbling.

What accidental miracle will you perform today?

Maybe send this article to a widow who needs comfort and some wonderful new friends.

WHEN YOUR HUSBAND HAS DIED -  A Survival Guide

From “In My Heels” – another supporting article

Photo by Jenny Terasaki