This is me at two!

It is pretty obvious from the picture that I thought I was pretty hot stuff. And from the looks of this photo, I had great plans to continue.

Time takes its tariff on the intentions we had as a child.

Your birthday is coming up or has just past. Maybe it is a big number ending with a zero or a five. Those are the tough ones. The others in between seem to slide by.

The scary part is when you look at the Obituaries in the paper there are now names you recognize. You probably never looked before.

Here are a few suggestions that you might consider to weather this storm. They follow the five stages of grief that Elizabeth Kubler Ross made famous. In a way, getting older is a form of grief.

1. DENIAL. Of course, the first thing we do is start lying. (Someone once told me you have to start lying by at least five years because everyone else is lying and they immediately add five years on to what you claim is your age)

If we tell the truth we are now admitting it to ourselves. That is the beginning of freedom. You will probably be surprised because instead of someone feeling sorry for you because you are SO OLD, you will probably hear, “You have got to be kidding! You look great!”

2. ANGER. I haven’t done —- (Fill in your grievances here) then, get a yellow pad and get really mad about what you think you have missed. Don’t leave anything out. Remember, no one else will see this list but you and there is relief in admitting all.

3. BARGAINING. Please God let me live long enough to (fill in the blank)

Decide you will.

When I was in the travel business, I had a client who owned a funeral parlor. He used to book a big trip between Thanksgiving and Christmas. He called it his “slow season.”

I was curious about it because it was also flu season. Didn’t a lot of people die then? He told me people who make it past the first holiday do not die because they decide not to. So decide you will live long enough for your bargain to manifest. The Power of Intention is powerful!

4. DEPRESSION. You may need some medical help with this. Do not be ashamed to talk to your doctor. A round of anti-depressants might give you a lift so you can get on with the life. It is very hard to reinvent yourself if you are depressed.

One of the hardest parts of getting older is not having a goal, a passion. We are very ready to say, “What’s the use?”

The “use” is that we have learned a lot. We have made mistakes. We have had successes. There are young people out there who need to know what we know - including your children and grandchildren.

There are small businesses that are struggling and you could help. There are organizations like the Girls and Boys Club who could use you to help kids who need your wisdom and help with their homework. You may say you don’t have the energy. You may have to push yourself to volunteer once a week but you will feel better about it after that day. And you won’t feel so lonely.

You owe the planet something by taking up all that space for so many years. It is time to pay your bills. Do you think that someone who needs help is going to say, “Thanks, but you are too old?”

5. ACCEPTANCE. We all have this little secret. Everyone else is going to die except us. So, this is the toughest one. Chances are that we have a number of years to go before we go. But what has to be faced is that we may be on the downhill side of the slope.

But if you are reading this, you are still alive. And, if you are still alive, it means that there is a reason for it.

You can be a “hot” ninety year old!

And have fun remembering the wild and wonderful ride!

Special note:

This article was featured in the twenty second edition of the Carnival of Improving Life