A WOMAN WITHOUT A MAN – Script – A TV movie
ACT ONE
FADE IN:
EXT. A STREET IN CHICAGO– DAY
The rain is coming down in torrents. An older four door Lincoln is pulling into a parking lot under a sign which reads “Michaelson’s Funeral Home.” The car backfires as it is parked. Two women open umbrellas, exit the car and run toward the doorway.
VOICEOVER BY MEGAN
My husband, JULIUS is gone. He was always difficult but the last few years were really hard. For him – and for me. I’ll miss him terribly but in some ways – it’s a relief. When someone you love is that sick for five years, your grief gets all used up. That’s my sister JUNE with me. She lives in New York with her family. She flew in to Chicago for the funeral.
CUT TO
INT. FUNERAL HOME OFFICE– DAY
The pretty, forty year old widow, MEGAN, and her younger sister, June, are seated at the FUNERAL DIRECTOR’S desk. The large, florid faced man is asking questions and filling out forms. His assistant, IRVING, stands behind him. Both are dressed impeccably and are wearing sympathetic faces befitting the somber occasion.
VOICEOVER BY MEGAN
I always heard people died peacefully. Not Julius He was yelling, “NO! NO!” for the last minutes he was alive. Then, he just slipped away. I hope he is at rest now.
CUT TO
INT. FUNERAL HOME HALL
All four walk down a hall.
CUT TO
INT. FUNERAL HOME – COFFIN ROOM
A door opens from the lit hall and a hand reaches for a light switch – revealing a huge room filled with coffins. They usher in the women.
FUNERAL DIRECTOR
Dear ladies…I know what a shock it is to come in here. We want to make it as easy as we can for you. And, of course, do the right thing for Julius. This is his final curtain call and we are going to make it perfect for him.
MEGAN
Yes, we want it nice. Don’t we, June?
June nods.
JUNE
Julius always liked the best.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS, the deceased husband, walks into the coffin room. He is wearing a white dinner jacket and smoking a cigar.
FUNERAL DIRECTOR
(to his assistant)
Irving, move a couple of these boxes out of the way. I want to show the ladies Mrs. Updike’s husband’s casket. She was so happy with it. It is just the perfect chariot for Julius’ journey to Eternity.
IRVING
Oh y-y-y-esss. Th-th-the b-b-beautiful c-c-c-ccopper one?
FUNERAL DIRECTOR
You know the Updike’s of course. They live on the Gold Coast. Wonderful people – and also such a terrible loss. This one is so perfect. Look at the mattress. A full three inches. It will be so comfortable for your dear Julius.
He grabs June’s hand to have her feel it. She pulls her hand back in horror.
FUNERAL DIRECTOR (CONT’D)
And the color of the lining. The pale pink. Just so flattering to the complexion.
(small laugh)
We need all the help we can get at a time like this.
MEGAN
What does something like this cost?
FUNERAL DIRECTOR
Oh, it’s quite reasonable when you take into consideration all that you get. The limos – two of them – the opening of the grave
(coughs delicately))
and of course the WATERTIGHT liner. We fondly refer to this package as “The Emperor.” It’s pure elegance!
MEGAN
That looks expensive.
FUNERAL DIRECTOR
The entire thing. I mean EVERYTHING is $30,000.
The ghost of Julius flicks his cigar ash on the carpet.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I damn well am not going to spend that kind of money for this funeral.
Megan seems to hear a voice. She looks around and sees no one.
MEGAN
Did you hear a voice, June?
JUNE
Hear what? No, I didn’t hear anything.
MEGAN
(back to the funeral director)
Look, I want to spend $8000. What can I buy for $8000?
FUNERAL DIRECTOR
(rolling his eyes at his assistant)
Well, we will be hard pressed to deliver your beloved Julius’ funeral at that price but I will try.
MEGAN
Good.
FUNERAL DIRECTOR
Just one request. Please. Please. Do not ask a question about WATER. Just don’t go there.
MEGAN
I’d like to get this over with.
FUNERAL DIRECTOR
Irving, get #9 and wheel it over here.
IRVING
Th-th-the s-s-silver one with the gray lining?
FUNERAL DIRECTOR
No, Irving. That’s #8.
(turns to the women smiling wanly)
#9 has a much younger look.
Megan and June look at each other and try not to laugh.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
People always say I look young for my age.
CUT TO
EXT — OUTSIDE A CHAPEL — DAY
The funeral service has ended. The widow, her sister and her teenage son, ALEX, are walking toward a limousine for the funeral procession.
ALEX
Do you think I should apologize to everyone Dad insulted?
MEGAN
No, Alie. People only remember the good things.
ALEX
So, what should I say to everybody?
JUNE
Just say, “thank you for coming,” Alex.
As they are about to get into the limousine, Irving, the assistant funeral director pulls Megan aside.
MEGAN
Yes?
IRVING
Th-th-this may b-be the -wr-wr-wrong t-time to ask you th-this, b-but are you s-s-seeing anyone?
Megan looks horrified and gets into the car. Behind Irving, the ghost of Julius appears. He flicks his cigar ash in Irving’s general direction.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Gettatahere you PUNK. She’s way out of your league.
Another apparition appears behind the ghost of Julius. DANNY is a short, rotund “angel” wearing a wrinkled suit and a battered fedora. His job is to escort Julius to the other side. He arrives flustered and out of breath.
DANNY
Where have you been? I thought you were right behind me and when I looked you were gone. I’ve got such a headache over this.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Who the hell are you?
DANNY
I’m Danny. I’m your agent.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Agent?
DANNY
Some of the people over here call themselves angels but this is my first job.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Since when do I need an agent?
DANNY
We take you over to the other side. You don’t live on earth anymore.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I’m not going anywhere with you. Now, scram!
DANNY
I’m going to have to report this to The Committee. You are screwing up their statistics.
Danny takes his cellphone out of his pocket and dials.
DANNY (CONT’D)
We got problems here. You told me this was an easy booking.
CUT TO
EXT. TRAVEL AGENCY — DAY
Megan is pulling into a parking space outside of the travel agency she owns. It is located in a strip mall in the outskirts of Chicago. There are posters in the window advertising various travel destinations and airlines. Halfway in, the old Lincoln stalls. She restarts the car, parks it and walks inside the agency.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY- MAIN OFFICE– DAY
A bell RINGS when the front door is opened. There is a main front office with four desks, two on each side, each with a computer. Racks of brochures line the side walls. Some are curled over and look messy.
SALLY sits at the front desk.
SALLY
You have clients waiting for you in your office. I gave them their tickets but they want to say hello.
MEGAN
Oh, thanks, Sally.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MEGAN’S OFFICE
Megan has a private office with a larger desk and a computer. There are bookcases on the wall behind her and two chairs for clients in front of the desk.
Megan enters her office. Sign on door says “President.” Two ELDERLY LADY clients are seated. They stand to greet her.
ELDERLY LADY – ONE
So nice to see you, Megan. We came in to pick up our tickets to Florida. You look wonderful.
ELDERLY LADY – TWO
So sorry to hear about your husband. What a terrible loss. How are you, dear?
Megan starts to answer but the ladies continue to talk.
ELDERLY LADY – ONE
You’re a young, attractive woman. You’ll find someone. Take my advice. Look for someone younger this time. More your age. They last longer.
As they leave, one of the clients turns to Megan.
ELDERLY LADY – TWO
Don’t wait too long. Time marches on. A woman without a man is a terrible thing.
ELDERLY LADY – ONE
Are you seeing anyone yet?
MEGAN
Not quite yet.
Megan sits down and starts opening the piles of mail on her desk.
VOICEOVER BY MEGAN
My husband Julius was a stockbroker. He didn’t know the travel business. But that never stopped him from coming in here after the market closed and telling everybody what to do.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MAIN OFFICE
CATHERINE is staring at her computer. She is wearing jeans, a sweater and John Lennon glasses.
VOICEOVER BY MEGAN
Catherine is a 25 year old spinster in the making. She has clients among the wealthy Southside Irish of Chicago so she is a valuable employee. But she booked a man who was going to the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota into Rochester, New York so she has to be watched.
CATHERINE
(looks up as though remembering)
I was so happy when I got him on a nonstop flight.
The ROAR of a motorcycle is heard outside. NICK is seen through the glass front door taking off on his Harley. ANNIE walks into the office and takes her seat.
VOICEOVER BY MEGAN
Annie used to teach kindergarten. She has a series of boyfriends - motorcyclists – who keep her up late.
SALLY
An nice girl like you shouldn’t be hanging around with scooter trash.
ANNIE
He’s not scooter trash. Nick is a member of the Hell’s Angels. That’s like royalty,
Sally picks up a telephone call.
VOICEOVER BY MEGAN
Sally runs the show around here. We don’t know much about her personal life except she’s been divorced and is very involved with her sister’s kids. She has a clientele of Russian immigrants. No one can handle them but her.
SALLY
Wait, wait, listen to me. This is the cheapest fare. Did I get you a good deal to Fort Lauderdale last year? Do I take care of you? Listen!
LINDA is arriving at the office. She stumbles and almost falls.
VOICEOVER BY MEGAN
Linda is involved in a messy divorce and has a over medication problem.
LINDA
We’ve got to fix this carpet. It’s dangerous.
CATHERINE
Megan already had it fixed.
Linda sits down at the third desk.
HARRIET is sitting behind Sally filing her nails.
VOICEOVER BY MEGAN
Harriet is married to SHELLEY. She is a compulsive talker and will continue a conversation with you even if you leave the room.
HARRIET
Last night I made such a wonderful roast. Shelley doesn’t make me cook. But I said to Shelley -
Sally interrupts her.
SALLY
Please. I’m trying to concentrate.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY –BACK OFFICE
The women lunch together in the back office at a large table. Deli sandwiches are being delivered by MIKE. He barks the orders out.
MIKE
Who gets the BLT? The turkey on white? The turkey on wheat? Tuna? Here. Here’s the invoice. You girls figure it out. I want to talk to Megan.
CUT TO
MEGAN’S OFFICE
Megan is on the telephone with a client. Mike leans on the doorway.
MEGAN
- Excuse me, can you hold on a minute?
Megan puts her call on hold and looks up at Mike. He smoothes his hair and forces a smile.
MEGAN (CONT’D)
Hello, Mike. What can I do for you?
MIKE
I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am about the passing of your husband.
MEGAN
That’s sweet of you.
MIKE
I just wanted to tell you if there’s anything I can do – -
MEGAN
Thank you Mike. I’m doing just fine.
Mike musters up courage and comes to the point –
MIKE
The Meatpackers Union is having their annual ball Saturday night. It costs $40.00 a couple. We could split it.
Megan is speechless. Mike decides to sweeten the offer.
MIKE (CONT’D)
I’ll pay for gas and parking!
MEGAN
Thanks, Mike. I’m not ready. Look, I’m sorry, but I’m on the phone.
CUT TO
LUNCH IN THE BACK OFFICE – A FEW MINUTES LATER
The women are hungrily eating their sandwiches and talking. The ghost of Julius and Danny are also seated at the table.
MEGAN
Did you hear what those women said this morning? Am I seeing anyone yet. It’s been a month.
ANNIE
People think you are nothing if you don’t have a man.
CATHERINE
Speaking of men, how is the divorce going, Linda?
LINDA
Slow. Very slow. He’s back living with “the child,” you know.
SALLY
What child?
LINDA
That bimbo he’s shacked up with. She’s 20. I hear he beat her up. He does that, you know.
MEGAN
A man is the last thing I have on my mind. You know how difficult Julius could be. Sometimes I feel he’s still around.
SALLY
Julius was a good guy. A little opinionated but -
The ghost of Julius is defensive at Sally’s remark.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Being right is not opinionated!
CATHERINE
My mother stayed in the house after she died. I’d come home at night and I could hear her rattling pots in the kitchen. She gave me recipes in my sleep.
The women all react with astonishment at that remark.
MEGAN
You’re kidding me! How long did she stay around?
CATHERINE
For a while. I talked to a psychic about it. He said that some spirits just don’t want to leave.
Sally is obviously uncomfortable talking about the departed.
SALLY
I don’t believe this conversation. Dead is dead.
CATHERINE
Then where did I get those recipes?
You know I don’t cook.
Hold on Megan as she ponders that thought.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Nobody’s dead around here. I never felt better in my life.
MEGAN
I was too dependent on Julius. I just want to be free now.
SALLY
That’s what I like about being involved with my sister’s kids. No husbands, laundry, homework or chickenpox.
Lunch is over. The women are clearing off the table.
SALLY (CONT’D)
What are you going to do with all that freedom?
Megan hesitates and then blurts it out.
MEGAN
I want to get my eyes done. I feel old and worn out.
The ghost of Julius walks out of the room.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
And that, without a doubt, is the stupidest idea you ever had.
Catherine gets up from the table and cleans off her area.
CATHERINE
I am glad to get home to my books and my cat. By the way, I’d like you all to remember Blackie in your prayers.
LINDA
You want us to pray for a cat?
CATHERINE
My vet says he has a tumor. I hope it’s benign.
Megan is going back to work. She turns to Catherine.
MEGAN
We’ll all keep Blackie in our good thoughts.
CUT TO
EXT. MEGAN’S HOME — A TYPICAL CHICAGO NEIGHBORHOOD – DAY
Megan lives in a yellow brick, Georgian house, on a small lot. She has parked her car in the driveway and is walking in the front door with groceries.
CUT TO
INT. ALEX’S ROOM — DAY
A standard teenage room. Posters. Unmade bed. Clothes on the floor. Megan is knocking on Alex’s door. Rock music is BLASTING.
MEGAN
Alex, could I come in for a minute?
Alex turns off the music and opens the door.
MEGAN (CONT’D)
Look, I want to apologize for what I said about your writing the household checks from now on.
ALEX
I thought it would help you if I did what Dad did. I know you miss him.
MEGAN
I do, Alie. But, there’s plenty of time for you to have those responsibilities.
ALEX
I wouldn’t mind doing it.
MEGAN
And I don’t want you to think you have to stay home with me. I want you to go out and have fun.
ALEX
I don’t want you to be alone, Mom.
Alex comes over and gives her a hug.
MEGAN
Please, Alie. I want you to be a kid. Just be a kid.
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME – DEN — NIGHT
Megan is on the telephone with her sister, June. The ghost of Julius and Danny are listening to the conversation.
MEGAN
June, I keep telling you, Julius is still around. He has something to say to me about everything. Just like he always did. I hope I am not going nuts.
(Megan pauses as she listens to her sister)
Alright. I’ll try to ignore it.
Danny begins lecturing the ghost of Julius.
DANNY
See, you are not supposed to be here. It’s against the rules.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
How did you get to be assigned to me anyway? I’ve avoided sleaseballs like you all my life.
DANNY
Maybe so you’ll learn there are no sleaseballs. We’re all the same.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Yeah. Right. What do you know, sleaseball?
CUT TO
EXT- A BUSY STREET IN CHICAGO — DAY
A POLICEMAN has his SIREN on behind Megan’s big Lincoln. She doesn’t stop. The SIREN continues. She looks at her rear view mirror, turns around, and motions to the policeman as if to say – ME? She finally stops and pulls over. The policeman walks to her car.
POLICEMAN
You just made an illegal left turn. Didn’t you see that sign?
MEGAN
No, I’m sorry officer, I didn’t.
POLICEMAN
Your license plates expired four months ago. And your city sticker expired two months ago.
MEGAN
Oh.
POLICEMAN
I’m going to have to give you three tickets.
MEGAN
My husband died. He always took care of the car.
POLICEMAN
I’m sorry to hear about your husband but you’re going to have to get it together, lady.
MEGAN
Okay. I will
He is writing tickets as he talks.
POLICEMAN
This is none of my business but look at the sticker on your windshield. You haven’t changed the oil in this car for 6000 miles. You should take care of that.
MEGAN
OK. I will.
The ghost of Julius is sitting in the back seat of the car as she drives home.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Do you know what those tickets are going to cost me?
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME – DEN — AFTERNOON
The ghost of Julius is trying to make a telephone call. He is pushing the buttons and nothing is happening. Danny is reading the paper.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Hello. Hello. Hello. This stupid phone.
DANNY
Who do you think you’re calling?
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
My lawyer, Sidney. I’m going to have him draw up a living will. I don’t want that burden on Megan in case anything happens to me. Hello. Hello.
DANNY
It’s too late for that.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
(trying to dial again)
Hello. Hello. Damn! I have to talk to Megan about replacing this phone.
DANNY
They can’t hear you, Julius.
CUT TO
INT. BIG WEDDING RECEPTION– NIGHT
Shot of a BRIDE AND GROOM dancing on a crowded dance floor. Megan is all dressed up and sitting alone at a table for ten. Everyone else is dancing.
CUT TO
INT. LUNCH IN A RESTAURANT — DAY
Megan is having lunch with her GIRLFRIEND.
GIRLFRIEND
I know you’ll understand. My table seats ten and if I invite you I’ll waste an empty chair. And there are those Andersons. I owe them an invitation. You know how it is.
CUT TO
EXT. ALONG THE LAKEFRONT PATH — DAY
Megan is rollerblading with her friend, ARLENE.
ARLENE
I’m not a bit surprised. Married women do not want us around. We’re a threat.
MEGAN
Come on. These women know I’m not interested in their husbands. Julius and I have known these couples for years.
ARLENE
Trust me. Look, here’s the formula. If you want to see them, entertain. If you invite them twice, they will feel obligated to invite you once.
MEGAN
That’s terrible. I always included you. You’re single.
The ghost of Julius and Danny are also on rollerblades struggling to keep up with the women.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Hey! Wait up. You’re going too fast.
The women quickly leave them behind. The ghost of Julius calls out after them.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS (CONT’D)
I always told you those people were a waste of time.
DANNY
This is very dangerous. I’m going to end up in a hospital with this booking.
CUT TO
EXT. A GARDEN SUPPLY CENTER — DAY
Megan is conferring with a salesman.
MEGAN
Could give me some advice? These Impatiens say shade and the Geraniums say sun. Can I plant them together?
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Put those red geraniums back. We had red last year. We’ll have pink this year.
CUT TO
PARKING LOT
Megan is loading the trunk of her car with pink geraniums.
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME – LIVING ROOM — DAY
Megan is talking to her friend, JOHNNY, who is an interior decorator. They are in the living room which has dark walls and heavy red velvet drapes. Johnny has paint chips and he is holding them up to the wall.
MEGAN
I want everything light, Johnny. I want a big change. And I always hated these drapes.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
That color is too light. And what’s wrong with the drapes?
MEGAN
(to the ghost)
Did I ask your opinion?
JOHNNY
Who are you talking to?
MEGAN
To Julius. Who else?
Johnny does a double take at that statement.
JOHNNY
Maybe we should take a break and have a martini now. Or have you started without me?
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – BACK OFFICE — DAY
The women are opening cartons of Thai food. There is a ROAR of a motorcycle outside.
CUT TO
EXT.–OUTSIDE THE AGENCY — DAY
Annie gets off a Harley chopper from behind a leather-jacketed man. He leans over and kisses her. Then he whacks her on the behind. She laughs and enters the office.
CUT TO
BACK OFFICE
Annie walks back to the lunch area.
ANNIE
Sorry I’m late. I was detained against my will.
SALLY
Until lunchtime?
ANNIE
I’ll make it up, Megan. I’ll stay late.
MEGAN
Anyway, as I was saying. I was thinking about taking a cruise. We just got a very reasonable offer to the Caribbean. What do you think?
CATHERINE
I think you should do it. Just do it. You haven’t been anywhere for a long time.
MEGAN
I’m going to do it.
The ghost of Julius and Danny have arrived in the office to hear the last of the conversation.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Good idea. I could use a vacation.
DANNY
This is not part of my contract. I hate water.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Who invited you?
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME – BEDROOM — AFTERNOON
A sunburned Megan is unpacking her suitcase in her bedroom and putting things away. She is talking to her sister June on a portable phone.
MEGAN
I had a horrible time. The ship was full of widows. They sat us together. And every single one of us had sequin dresses.
She takes a sequin dress out of the suitcase and hangs it in the closet.
DISSOLVE TO
INT. AT DINNER ON THE SHIP — NIGHT
Ten WIDOWS at the table. Pan over to another table. And another. All women gowned in sequin dresses.
MEGAN
This is my first trip alone. It’s an experience.
WIDOW ONE
You’ll get used to it. I felt that way when Harry first passed on.
The widow dismisses Megan with that remark. The women go on with their conversation.
WIDOW TWO
I want to tell you girls about the darling camel seat I got in St. Thomas today.
WIDOW THREE
What did you pay for it?
WIDOW TWO
It took me an hour of bargaining but I got him down to $19.00.
WIDOW THREE
I bought one right on the pier in San Juan yesterday for $15.00.
WIDOW FOUR
When I was on Royal Viking Lines a few years ago I saw them in Tangier for $10.00.
She is studying the menu.
WIDOW FOUR (CONT’D)
So what are we going to have for dessert? I think I’ll order all of them.
WIDOW FIVE
We need our strength for jewelry at H. Stern in Caracas tomorrow.
WIDOW ONE
The sea air is shrinking all my clothes.
WIDOW SIX
I always wear my thin clothes first. Are we playing bridge tonight?
WIDOW SEVEN
I’m going up to the nightclub and heckle that terrible magician. He’s very attractive.
Megan tries to get into the conversation.
MEGAN
Is there dancing after the show?
WIDOW SIX
Don’t be delusional. The captain is a drunk. The cruise staff is gay. And the officers won’t dance with you unless you are under 30.
WIDOW SEVEN
You want to dance? Go back to Chicago. Find yourself a nice guy and bring him with you next time.
WIDOW EIGHT
You’ll learn. A woman without a man is a terrible thing.
CUT TO
EXT. OUTSIDE DECK OF THE SHIP — DAY
Megan is sitting on the deck reading. A WOMAN approaches.
WOMAN
Is anyone sitting here?
MEGAN
No, please sit down.
Woman settles down with her things and starts applying sunblock.
WOMAN
Are you traveling alone?
MEGAN
Yes. I’m a new widow. I hate it.
WOMAN
I remember those days myself. It’s hard to start a whole new life. But, let me give you a little advice. Start.
MEGAN
I don’t even know where to start.
The ghost of Julius is in his bathing suit sunning himself on a deck chair. He is wearing a Panama hat and sunglasses.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
You could start by growing up, you know.
Danny is sitting on a deck chair next to the ghost of Julius in his wrinkled suit. He is wearing sunglasses and his hat is pulled down over his eyes. He is fanning himself. His cellphone is ringing.
DANNY
Where am I? On a stinking ship in the middle of an ocean for Chrissakes! This humidity is killing me.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Who was that?
DANNY
It’s the Committee chairman. You’re still showing absent on his computer printout and he is hopping mad.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Tell him to scratch me off his list. They are not taking me alive.
FADE OUT
ACT 2
FADE IN:
INT. A BOARD MEETING ON THE OTHER SIDE — DAY
Fade up from a white screen to a conference room. Pan a group of shadowy white figures who are sitting around a table covered with a white tablecloth. Danny is sitting at the far end of the table. Close shot on the CHAIRMAN who is also in white with a long white beard.
CHAIRMAN
We’ve had a good week. All except you, Danny. Where is Julius?
DANNY
This is the toughest booking of my career, Chief.
CHAIRMAN
Have you told him that he will be happier with us here?
DANNY
This guy will not accept his life is over. He thinks he can get back into it and do things over.
CHAIRMAN
You’ve got a clock on you, Danny. Get it done.
CUT TO
EXT. LA SALLE STREET – CHICAGO – MORNING
The ghost of Julius is entering a large office building. He is wearing a suit and tie and carrying a briefcase. Danny runs in behind him.
DANNY
Where are you going?
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
To my office, stupid. I’ve been out sick. God knows what they’ve done with my clients.
DANNY
I wouldn’t advise it.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Who asked you for advice?
CUT TO
INT.– OFFICE BUILDING
They are now ascending in a crowded elevator.
DANNY
You’re not going to like what you find. Trust me.
They get off the elevator and the ghost of Julius greets the receptionist at the front desk of his office.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Good morning, Helen.
The receptionist does not hear him. They walk through the office. The ghost of Julius greets several people on the way. No one responds. He paused at the door of an office and inspects the nameplate. It is not his. JOHN, a young stockbroker,is sitting at Julius’ desk talking on the telephone.
JOHN
OK, George, I’ll sell the T-bills and buy Microsoft for you today.
The ghost of Julius steps up to the desk and wags his finger in John’s face. John does not flinch.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Hey, that’s my client you’re talking to! Don’t you dare sell his T-bills. You’re churning him.
DANNY
He can’t hear you, Julius. Let’s go.
John hangs up the phone and calls out to ALICE, the assistant. He picks up a small box from the floor.
JOHN
Alice, when are you going to get this junk out of my office?
Alice enters the room.
ALICE
I’ll send it out to Julius’ wife later today.
JOHN
Not that she needs any more reminders of that pompous ass. What was his problem, anyway?
ALICE
He was an okay guy, John. He sure loved his kid.
JOHN
His kid belongs to an elite club. Julius was a professional stockbroker but an amateur human being.
Alice’s phone is RINGING. She hurries out to answer it. John idly rummages through the box, takes out a gold pen, looks at it, shrugs and puts it in his desk drawer.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Look at that, Danny. The guy is a thief!
DANNY
See? I told you not to come here.
A dejected ghost of Julius slowly walks out of the office. He and Danny get into the elevator.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
You don’t know who your friends are until you’re half dead.
DANNY
You’re completely dead.
They walk out of the elevator.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I‘m coming back. see? And you’re going to help me.
Danny looks upward toward heaven.
DANNY
Oy! Why me?
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME – DINING ROOM – MORNING
Alex is having breakfast. Megan has a thick sheaf of papers and she is intently filling them out.
ALEX
What are all those papers, Mom?
MEGAN
It’s an application the Veterans Administration sent me.
ALEX
What are you applying for?
MEGAN
I have no idea.
ALEX
Then why are you doing all that work?
MEGAN
Your Dad was in their Navy. You never know. We might be entitled to something.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MAIN OFFICE — DAY
Megan is walking in the office.
SALLY
Annie is in your office. She’s upset. The church canceled the Rome tour.
CUT TO
MEGAN’S OFFICE
Annie is sitting on a chair in front of Megan’s desk and is SOBBING.
MEGAN
Maybe we can offer them another destination. A lot of European tours are being canceled.
ANNIE
The priest said they were not going anywhere. 40 people, Megan. I was counting on this commission.
MEGAN
I know. So was I. It is a big loss in revenue for the agency.
ANNIE
Maybe I should get out of travel and go back to teaching kindergarten.
MEGAN
This business is getting tougher and tougher every day.
CUT TO
INT. CHURCH MEETING ROOM — NIGHT
A sign on the front door reads, “St. Jude’s Widows Support Group.”
GREETER AT THE DOOR
It’s nice to meet you, Megan. How long have you been a widow?
MEGAN
It’s been a little while now.
GREETER
Oh, I’m sorry you didn’t come sooner.
CUT TO
MEETING ROOM
About twelve older women sitting in chairs with desk arms. Some are crying. The SPEAKER is on the podium.
SPEAKER
Good evening ladies. Are you all set for our program? Now, each of you have a sample check in front of you. Have you got it? Does everyone have a pen? Good. Now let’s start from the top. Fill in the date. Now go down to where it says “Pay to the order of.” That’s where you put in the person or business you are paying. After that you write in the amount in figures.
The woman sitting next to Megan fills out her check and compares it with Megan’s to see if it is correct.
SPEAKER (CONT’D)
Now here’s the tricky part. Look at the next line. It ends in “dollars.”
CUT BACK TO FRONT DOOR
Megan is trying to slip out quietly. The greeter stops her.
GREETER
Are you leaving?
MEGAN
Yes, I have to go. I have an early appointment tomorrow.
GREETER
Oh, I’m so sorry. You’ll be missing “The Mystery of the Bank Statement.” It’s just fascinating.
MEGAN
Perhaps another time.
The ghost of Julius is pulling on his camel hair coat.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
(directing his comment to the Greeter who does not hear him))
I always handle the bank statements anyway.
CUT TO
INT. HEALTH CLUB — DAY -
Megan is stretching out on a mat with two WOMEN club members.
FIRST WOMAN
It cost Sylvia $30,000.00 but I’ll tell you, her own mother wouldn’t recognize her. She had EVERYTHING done – face – boobs – tummy tuck and a fanny lift.
SECOND WOMAN
I hear she is dating a 38 year architect. She’s 60 if she is a day.
MEGAN
It sure would be nice to have that kind of money.
The ghost of Julius is standing nearby in his designer sweats.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Why do you waste your time with those stupid broads?
Megan gets off the mat and starts running on the treadmill. The ghost of Julius gets on the treadmill next to her.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS (CONT’D)
OK. I’m going to give you a break. Call Alice at the brokerage house and put in a buy order for 200 shares of IBM at 118. As soon as it hits, tell her to put in a sell order at 130.
MEGAN
Can I be hearing this?
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Just do what I tell you for a change. But don’t be a greedy. Sell at 130. The roof on our house needs work.
CUT TO
TRAVEL AGENCY – BACK OFFICE – SAME DAY
Lunchtime.
MEGAN
I’m telling you. That’s what I heard. I think I’m going to do it.
SALLY
Here’s a paper. Let’s look it up.
They all examine the stock prices in the Chicago Tribune.
SALLY (CONT’D)
This is crazy, Megan. IBM is selling at 150. Your broker is going to laugh at you.
ANNIE
I think she should do it.
MEGAN
I’m going to call Alice right now.
Megan leaves the lunchroom to call Alice.
HARRIET
Everyone is hearing voices around here. Maybe we should check with Shelley. He knows about -
Catherine interrupts.
CATHERINE
If I can get recipes, why can’t she get a stock tip?
LINDA
(sarcastically)
Maybe we’d do more business around here doing seances.
Megan returns to the lunchroom.
MEGAN
The order is in.
SALLY
Did she think you were crazy?
MEGAN
She said if anyone could get a message out from the grave it would be Julius.
CUT TO THE MAIN OFFICE
The ghost of Julius is standing outside the doorway and has been overseeing the transaction. Danny is with him.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Grave? What grave? I’ve got a good thirty years left in me.
DANNY
Not on this side you don’t.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I’ve made mistakes. I have to do some things over.
DANNY
You don’t understand. You can’t change the past. It’s over.
The women are filing out of the lunchroom to go back to work.
SALLY
By the way, Megan. The Green couple called. I think they are going to buy that World Cruise.
CUT TO
MAIN OFFICE – LATER
Megan is walking an elegantly dressed couple to the door.
MEGAN
Send us postcards. Have a wonderful time on your cruise. It’s going to be so exciting.
The couple leave. Megan takes a key out of her pocket and quickly locks the door to the agency. She picks up the phone on Sally’s desk.
MEGAN (CONT’D)
This is Megan at the travel agency on Lincoln. Could you send someone over? We have a lot of cash to take to the bank.
CUT TO
EXT. A POLICE CAR PULLS UP — DAY
Annie and Linda walk out of the agency and get in Linda’s car. They follow the police car which has his SIREN on. When they get to the bank, Annie gets out and goes into the bank while the ERIC, the policeman waits outside. Annie comes out of the bank.
ANNIE
Thanks for the escort. I don’t think I’ve seen you before. Are you new in the precinct?
ERIC
Yes. Just got out of the academy. I’m Eric.
ANNIE
Well, hello Eric. I’m Annie.
CUT TO
INT. LINDA’S CAR
Linda and Annie are riding back in the car to the agency.
ANNIE
That new cop is kinda cute. But, Linda, I never saw so much money at one time. Fifty thousand dollars in cash. And I can’t pay my Visa bill.
LINDA
How come?
ANNIE
I got a $500.00 cash advance. I figured the commission on the church tour would cover it
LINDA
What for?
ANNIE
Don’t say anything but I had to bail Nick out of jail. One of his old girlfriends said he threw her down the stairs.
LINDA
You’ve only known that guy a month.
ANNIE
I believe Nick. I couldn’t let an innocent man sit in jail.
LINDA
Annie?
ANNIE
What?
LINDA
Be careful.
ANNIE
Don’t worry. I always wear a helmet.
CUT TO
EXT. MEGAN’S HOME –DAY
Megan and a ROOFER are in the back of the house. Megan is at the top of a ladder looking at her roof. The roofer is holding the ladder steady.
MEGAN
What am I supposed to be looking at?
ROOFER
Do you see those cracks?
MEGAN
I see a black roof with some stones on it.
ROOFER
Look over to the right. Don’t you see those long cracks?
MEGAN
Not really. Is that what’s causing the leak?
ROOFER
Yes. We have to tear the whole thing off and put new paper and tar and gravel.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
This guy is a thief. Get another estimate.
Megan is still on the ladder. She looks at the roof and then at the roofer.
MEGAN
I’m a little confused about this. I’ll have to let you know.
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME- BASEMENT — DAY
A SERVICEMAN has his head in the dryer. There are parts all over the floor.
SERVICEMAN
Well, this one is dead. The motor is shot.
MEGAN
Can you fix it?
SERVICEMAN
We could put in a new motor. It would be about $200.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
You don’t fix a dryer that is 20 years old. Buy a new dryer.
MEGAN
Maybe I should just get a new dryer.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
What would you do without me?
CUT TO
EXT. A GARAGE– DAY
A MECHANIC is looking under the hood of Megan’s car.
MEGAN
It’s stalling. If I stop at a light, it dies. If I stop at a stop sign, it dies. It needs a little adjustment.
MECHANIC
I think we have big problems here. You may even need an overhaul.
Megan hesitates before responding. She is suspicious.
MEGAN
I’m going to have to talk to my husband about that.
MECHANIC
I thought you told me your husband died.
MEGAN
Well, he kinda died.
The ghost of Julius is walking around the car kicking the tires.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Another thief. Take the car to the dealer. At least they are high class crooks.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MEGAN’S OFFICE–DAY
ALAN, the accountant, walks in to Megan’s office with spreadsheets and sits down.
MEGAN
So, how bad do things look?
ALAN
The quarter is not good. I don’t see any invoices here for Acme Press. What happened to them?
MEGAN
They have a moratorium on salesman travel right now.
ALAN
How’s the fall shaping up?
MEGAN
We’ve had some cancellations. But we’re hoping things will get better.
I sold a World Cruise this week.
ALAN
You’re going to have to put some money in here again to keep the agency going.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
If you had built an organization like I told you – you wouldn’t be in this mess.
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME- BATHROOM – NIGHT
Megan is in a bubble bath. Her eyes are covered with a cloth. An audio TAPE is playing in a portable radio on the floor.
TAPE
More and more. I appreciate the abundance all around me.
More and more. I give thanks for the abundance I already have. More and more. I see more abundance coming in. More and more. The abundance overwhelms me with its goodness.
The ghost of Julius sticks his head in the doorway. He is in green silk pajamas.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Did you ever think of making money the old fashioned way? Like earning it?
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME -DEN — SUNDAY MORNING
A quiet Sunday morning at home. Megan is reading the Chicago Tribune in her chair. Danny is standing reading the Hollywood Reporter. The ghost of Julius is reading the New York Times on the couch. Alex is sitting on the other side of the couch studying.
ALEX
Listen to this, Mom. Thoreau wrote it. It’s from Walden. “If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.” Mom, are you listening?
MEGAN
(trying to concentrate on her paper)
Yes, I’m listening, Alex. That’s really beautiful.
ALEX
Dad said he was paying big numbers for my education and I wouldn’t make a dime studying philosophy.
The ghost of Julius looks up from his paper.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Listen, son, I’m changing. I want whatever makes you happy.
Alex does not hear him but looks thoughtful.
ALEX
I want to study things that will benefit my whole life. I’ll think about money later.
MEGAN
Your Dad was always saving for retirement. It was his way of loving us.
Alex picks up his books and walks out of the room.
ALEX
He never got to retire. I’m not going to live like that.
The ghost of Julius turns to Danny.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
What a wonderful kid. That’s why I have to come back.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MAIN OFFICE — DAY
Megan is arriving at the office
SALLY
You’ve got a call on line 2. I think it’s your broker.
CUT TO
MEGAN’S OFFICE
MEGAN
(on the phone)
Oh, my God, Alice. It really happened? I can’t believe it… No, I don’t want to buy anything else… No, he didn’t give me any more messages. Just send me a check.
CUT BACK TO
MAIN OFFICE
Megan runs out to tell Sally.
MEGAN
Sally. Can you believe it? It happened just like he said. I made almost $5000.
CUT TO
BACK OFFICE – LUNCHTIME
Everyone is very excited about Megan’s good fortune.
CATHERINE
See, Sally. I told you. You can get messages. Just like I told you.
SALLY
Don’t lecture me. Today I’m a believer. Let me know if you get any more stock tips.
ANNIE
I wish I had some money to invest.
HARRIET
I told Shelley about it. I told him, Shelley, let’s take a chance. Shelley, let’s do it.
LINDA
I don’t need investments. My lawyer just found bank accounts in Switzerland and in Cayman. That bastard was hiding a lot of money.
CATHERINE
So what are you going to do with the money, Megan?
MEGAN
Well …
(smiling)
I called the plastic surgeon. I’m going to have my eyes lifted.
SALLY
You are serious.
MEGAN
This windfall is found money. And it is going to give me a whole new outlook on life!
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Found money? Found money? Who do you think found it? What about the roof?
Danny has arrived in the office. The ghost of Julius is surprised to see him.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS (CONT’D)
I thought you left.
DANNY
I’m in and out. There’s no money on the other side you know.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
No money? How do people live?
DANNY
They don’t live. They’re dead.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I don’t get it.
DANNY
You’ll learn that wealth is in your mind and your heart. And being grateful for what you have.
Not in getting things.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
How do you learn that?
DANNY
Study. Then you get a new life on earth and can practice.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I need a new life now. Today.
DANNY
Are you kidding me? With your record, you’ll be learning lessons for a hundred years before they let you come back.
FADE OUT
ACT 3
FADE IN:
INT. MEGAN’S HOME -UPSTAIRS OFFICE — NIGHT
Alex is in the upstairs study doing his homework. Megan walks in.
MEGAN
Alex, I’ve been thinking. Why don’t we sell this house and get a condo downtown?
ALEX
Would we live near the lake?
MEGAN
Yes. We could live on Lake Shore Drive.
ALEX
That would be great. I wouldn’t have to cut the grass anymore.
CUT TO
INT. IN THE CAR — DAY
Megan is driving Alex to school.
MEGAN
You know if I sold the travel agency, we could move to California.
ALEX
Boy, it sure would be great to get out of the snow in the winter.
MEGAN
And you could transfer to USC.
ALEX
That would be cool.
CUT TO
EXT. MEGAN’S HOME – IN THE DRIVEWAY–DAY
Alex is helping Megan bring in some groceries.
MEGAN
You know with your good grades, I bet you could get into Oxford.
ALEX
England?
MEGAN
Yes. We could try it for a year. I could sell the agency. There’s nothing keeping us in Chicago.
ALEX
We could visit Liverpool where the Beatles came from.
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME – DINING ROOM –NIGHT
Megan and Alex are having dinner.
MEGAN
It’s so flat here in Chicago. Everywhere you go. Just flat.
ALEX
It’s the Midwest.
MEGAN
I was thinking how nice it would be to live in the mountains. Like Boulder, Colorado. There’s a wonderful university there.
ALEX
You are driving me crazy, Mom.
MEGAN
What do you mean?
ALEX
Every day you want to move to a different place.
MEGAN
I need a change in my life.
Alex starts clearing the table.
ALEX
When the moving van pulls up to the front door, let me know where we’re going.
The ghost of Julius is reading his paper at the table. He looks up over his half glasses. Danny is sitting next to him.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
We’re not moving anywhere. We are staying right here. We have too many memories here.
DANNY
How many times do I have to tell you you don’t live here anymore?
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MAIN OFFICE– DAY
There is a CLIENT seated at Linda’s desk with a very large, green PARROT perched on his arm. She is talking to Delta Airlines.
LINDA
The Delta supervisor says you will have to buy him a seat if you want to take him to Florida on the plane.
Linda looks at him sternly.
LINDA (CONT’D)
And he has to be in a cage.
CLIENT
Even if he pays for his own seat?
LINDA
Yes.
CLIENT
Well, it is important that he goes to the funeral.
LINDA
What name should I put on the ticket?
CLIENT
Lucky.
LINDA
Lucky?
CLIENT
Lucky Shapiro. Just like my cousin.
Linda gets up to pull the tickets off the machine and complete the transaction. In the meantime, the other women are talking to clients on the telephone.
HARRIET
The room is $75.00. A nice hotel. Shelley and I stayed there…
CATHERINE
I can deliver your ticket. Tell me how to get there making all right hand turns.
SALLY
What do you mean you missed the ship? No, they do not wait for people….
HARRIET
I said to the woman, I want to be up where I can see the river and she said for the river she gets $95.00. And I said no river’s worth it to me…
SALLY
You will have to fly to St. Maarten. They will not pay your airfare. You are supposed to be there when the ship sails.
The client and the parrot are leaving. The parrot breaks his silence and starts SHRIEKING.
PARROT
HEY! YOU BITCH! JERK! JACKASS!
The women are laughing
ANNIE
The passengers on that flight are in for a surprise.
LINDA
He told me the parrot was his cousin’s “only child,” so I decided to make the effort to get it approved.
SALLY
There are a million stories in this agency every day.
CUT TO
INT. OFFICE BUILDING — DAY
Shot of sign on glass door as Megan enters a local office of the Veterans Administration. There are several people waiting. She takes a number from the counter and sits down.
CUT TO
DESK OF COUNSELOR
A WOMAN COUNSELOR is writing as Megan sits down and then looks up.
WOMAN COUNSELOR
What can I do for you?
Megan nervously takes a letter out of her purse.
MEGAN
Months ago, you made me fill out 60 pages of forms. Today I got a letter from you saying I do not qualify for benefits because my income is $170,000.00
WOMAN COUNSELOR
I did not make you fill out forms. I did not write you the letter. That came from Washington.
MEGAN
I just want to know where you found that money.
WOMAN COUNSELOR
You will have to write to Washington.
CUT TO
TRAVEL OFFICE – FRONT OFFICE — DAY
Sally has a MAN WITH A YARMULKE on his head at her desk. She is handing him his ticket.
MAN WITH A YARMULKE
So, by the way, do you cook?
SALLY
Do you mean do I keep kosher?
MAN WITH A YARMULKE
Yes.
SALLY
Not any more.
MAN WITH A YARMULKE
We have a nice singles group at our temple. Maybe you could come sometime.
SALLY
I’m pretty busy.
CUT TO THE LUNCHROOM
After the client leaves, Sally walks back to the lunchroom where the women are just finishing lunch.
ANNIE
That guy was definitely hitting on you.
SALLY
I’m not interested. I’m through with slavery.
LINDA
There aren’t any good men out there.
Harriet is finishing her sandwich.
HARRIET
Shelley says lawyers are the worst. They just want to win the case.
Sally gets up to look for a file in the file cabinet.
SALLY
I can tell you doctors are cheap. And they think they are God. Even at home.
Linda adds another comment.
LINDA
Blue collar workers are too poor. And real estate or salesmen of any kind have no stable salary. Who wants to support these guys?
Catherine is wiping off the table with a paper towel.
CATHERINE:
The men who come in here from the corporations are all the same. Put them in a bottle. Shake them up. You pour out clones.
Annie is reapplying her lipstick.
ANNIE
And workaholics -
They have the money, but no time.
They are terrible in bed.
Linda sums it all up as she leaves the room.
LINDA
Like I said. There’s nobody out there.
The ghost of Julius is leaning against the wall, nodding approvingly. Danny is with him.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
That’s because the good ones are all dead!
DANNY
Are you actually going to admit that?
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME — MORNING
Megan is in the front hall in her bathrobe. Alex has his coat on and is swinging his book bag over his shoulder. He is on his way to classes.
ALEX
What are they going to do to you in the hospital?
MEGAN
A little procedure. A nothing. I’m taking the bus downtown today.
ALEX
Should I worry?
MEGAN
Of course not. For some stupid reason I have to spend the night.
ALEX
Call me when you are through and I’ll come down and pick you up.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MEGAN’S OFFICE — LUNCHTIME
Megan is in her office. Mike the delivery man comes in. He is holding a box of sandwiches.
MIKE
Do you like fish?
MEGAN
(wondering)
Yeah, I like fish.
MIKE
I’m going to Dore County this weekend to fish. Wanna come?
MEGAN
I don’t like to know fish personally.
MIKE
That’s what I like about you. You’re funny.
(pauses)
I could bring some food from the deli.
MEGAN
No thanks, Mike. I’m still not ready.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MAIN OFFICE — SAME AFTERNOON
Megan is leaving the office to get the bus downtown to the hospital.
MEGAN
I check in to the hospital this afternoon and then tomorrow is the eyelift.
SALLY
Are you nervous?
MEGAN
Of course not. It’s a nothing!
CUT TO
INT. HOSPITAL — AFTERNOON
Shot of Megan getting off an elevator the eighth floor. He has some papers in her hand. She checks in with a receptionist.
DISSOLVE TO
Megan is in the X-RAY department having a chest X-RAY.
DISSOLVE TO
A technician is taking blood samples.
DISSOLVE TO
Megan is on a table having an EKG.
MEGAN
Are you sure my doctor ordered all these tests? You know I’m not having brain surgery.
The ghost of Julius and Danny are sitting in the waiting room. The ghost of Julius is reading People magazine.
DANNY
Let’s get out of here. I hate hospitals. I’m starting to feel faint.
CUT TO
INT. HOSPITAL ROOM — SAME AFTERNOON
Megan is in a hospital gown and sitting up in bed. Arlene is pouring cocktails into glasses and arranging some snacks on the bed tray.
MEGAN
They are making such a fuss here. So many tests.
An oriental RESIDENT doctor comes in with a clipboard.
RESIDENT
I have a few questions for you.
MEGAN
You know, I have company right now. Check with the people on the eighth floor. They have all the answers you need.
The Resident sits down anyway.
ARLENE
(CLICKING glasses with Megan)
Well, here’s to looking at the new you!
RESIDENT
When did you first notice your condition?
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOSPITAL ROOM — MORNING
Megan is talking to Sally on the telephone.
MEGAN
I didn’t sleep a wink with the racket they make around here. And at these prices, they do not even include breakfast.
An ORDERLY is arriving with a stretcher.
MEGAN (CONT’D)
The Olson’s are leaving for Paris tonight. I forgot to get them seats on Air France.
ORDERLY
You have to go now.
MEGAN
Get them seats as far forward as possible. You know how claustrophobic she is.
ORDERLY
They want you to come now.
MEGAN
Can you wait minute? And order Mrs. Olson a seafood platter.
ORDERLY
I’ll help you on the stretcher.
MEGAN
This is business.
She is on the stretcher now.
MEGAN (CONT’D)
And order Mr. Olson a vegetarian meal.
The orderly takes the phone away from her, hangs it up and wheels her out.
CUT TO
INT. HOSPITAL ROOM — AFTERNOON
Megan is in bed in her hospital room after the eyelift. She has icepacks on her eyes. A NURSE is taking her pulse.
NURSE
Your doctor wants you to go to the bathroom.
The nurse helps her to get out of bed.
MEGAN
I can go by myself.
She nearly falls. The nurse supports her and they slowly walk to the bathroom. She accidentally looks at herself in the mirror
MEGAN (CONT’D)
OH MY GOD! IS THAT ME? WHAT DID HE DO TO ME?
Her eyes are almost swollen shut. She has black stitches above and below her eyes.
MEGAN (CONT’D)
WHY DIDN’T ANYBODY TELL ME THIS WAS AN OPERATION?
DISSOLVE TO
A few hours later. Megan is sitting up having lunch.
Her DOCTOR comes in.
DOCTOR
Megan, it went fine. You can go home this afternoon.
MEGAN
I think you should tell your people that this procedure involves cutting.
CUT TO
EXT. OUTSIDE THE HOSPITAL –LATE AFTERNOON
Alex is picking his mother up. A nurse is delivering Megan to the car in a wheelchair. She gets out and throws her overnight bag into the back seat.
ALEX
You look really bad, Mom.
She doesn’t answer.
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME – DEN — NIGHT
Megan is looking in a hand mirror she has propped on the end table. She is applying ice packs to her eyes and talking on the telephone to her attorney, SIDNEY.
MEGAN
Sidney, I think we have a lawsuit here…. Yes, I signed papers. A lot of papers.
(pause)
Sidney, you are not being supportive.
She hangs up on Sidney and dials Sally at home.
MEGAN (CONT’D)
The way I look I don’t think I will be back to work for a year.
The ghost of Julius is sitting on the couch. He gets up and turns on the TV. He is in his white dinner jacket and has a martini in his hand.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Just look what you’ve done to yourself! And the roof is still leaking.
Today Megan is in no mood to ignore him. She yells at him.
MEGAN
You can’t stay here anymore, Julius.
Megan walks out of the room and returns with more ice.
MEGAN (CONT’D)
You can’t sleep on your side of the bed – watch TV here – or pick out the flowers for the yard. It’s time for you to go away now.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
If it wasn’t for me -
He is slowly lighting his cigar. He puffs, then studies the ash.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS (CONT’D)
you’d be working in a 5 and 10 cent store in Brooklyn.
MEGAN
It’s where I’m going that counts.
Danny walks into the room, fanning himself.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Oh no! You again! You’re haunting me.
DANNY
Do you have to smoke that stinky cigar in the house?
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
This is a Cuban cigar, moron. You have a peasant nose.
Danny’s cellphone is ringing.
DANNY
OK. OK. I’ll come in. Get me a podiatrist appointment. My feet are killing me.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
What was that all about?
DANNY
They’re threatening to put me back in the Production Department.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
The movies?
DANNY
No. Babies. The crying drove me crazy. I could lose my job over you.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Get out of here and don’t come back.
DANNY
You’ll get me or somebody else.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Tell the Committee one message for me. I am willing to change. I can’t leave yet.
DANNY
It’s too late for this time, Julius. You can’t go back.
FADE OUT
ACT 4
FADE IN:
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MEGAN’S OFFICE — DAY
A CLIENT is picking up her tickets.
CLIENT
Well, I have to say. For only two weeks you look terrific.
MEGAN
Thanks. It’s given me a whole new attitude.
CLIENT
I need a few tucks. I just haven’t had the nerve. Maybe when I get back from my trip.
MEGAN
Go to my doctor. He’s expensive. But I always say go to Filene’s Basement for your clothes. Not your face.
CLIENT
Did it hurt?
MEGAN
Believe me when I tell you. It’s a NOTHING!
CUT TO
INT. OFFICE BUILDING — DAY
Megan is entering the office of the Veterans Administration. She has two letters in her hand. She gets a number from the counter and sits down and waits for her number to be called.
CUT TO
MALE COUNSELORS DESK
Megan sits down at a MALE COUNSELOR’S desk.
MALE COUNSELOR
What can I do for you?
Megan shows him the first letter.
MEGAN
You told me in this letter I didn’t qualify for benefits because I had an income of $170,000.00
MALE COUNSELOR
I didn’t tell you anything. That’s a letter from Washington.
MEGAN
I got a second letter today. It says I don’t qualify because I make over $4200.00
MALE COUNSELOR
That’s the rule.
MEGAN
I don’t care about the benefit rule. This is what I want to know. Would you mind telling me where the other $165,000.00 you found went?
MALE COUNSELOR
I didn’t find it. You’ll have to contact Washington.
Megan is angry.
MEGAN
You people are very uncooperative!
I and my whole family pay taxes in this country! I am going to hand this over right away to my attorney!
MALE COUNSELOR
Tell your attorney to contact Washington.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MAIN OFFICE–DAY
Annie is coming in late. She has a black eye.
HARRIET
My God, Annie! What happened to you? Look at your face!
ANNIE
A stupid thing. I got up in the middle of the night and I ran into a door.
HARRIET
That’s terrible. You poor thing.
DISSOLVE TO
BACK OFFICE –LUNCH
HARRIET
You need to get some nightlights. Shelley says that most accidents happen at home -
LINDA
(interrupting)
Annie?
ANNIE
What?
LINDA
I have an extra bedroom. Come and stay with me for a while.
CATHERINE
I bet you have nightlights.
LINDA
I do.
ANNIE
Give me some time to think about it.
CUT TO
INT. A NIGHTCLUB — NIGHT
It is crowded. A BAND is playing love songs. Megan is sitting at the bar with her girlfriend, Arlene.
MEGAN
So this is the Over 35 Singles group. I don’t know, Arlene. These people look a lot older than 35 to me.
An ELDERLY MAN is walking in. He is limping.
MEGAN (CONT’D)
Look at that guy coming in. He’s ancient
ARLENE
Well, you said that you wanted to start getting out. Sometimes there’s a younger crowd.
MEGAN
Tonight doesn’t seem to be the night.
The elderly man is tapping Megan on her shoulder
ELDERLY MAN
Would you like to dance?
MEGAN
You dance?
ELDERLY MAN
This is a nice slow number.
DISSOLVE TO
DANCE FLOOR
Megan is dancing with the elderly man. He puts both arms around her and starts pawing her from behind. She pulls away from him.
MEGAN
Look, you’re going to have to excuse me. I have to go to the ladies room.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MAIN OFFICE– DAY
Thai food is being delivered today. MR. CHUAN, the owner of the restaurant, is delivering the lunch. He collects the money and keeps looking toward the open door to Megan’s office.
CUT TO
MEGAN’S OFFICE
Mr. Chuan enters and bows politely.
MR. CHUAN
Sorry for trouble. You no more married lady?
MEGAN
No, Mr. Chuan. I’m not married anymore.
MR. CHUAN
Wife die. Long time now, Chuan no wife. You like married?
Megan bows back.
MEGAN
Like marry someday. Not ready now.
MR. CHUAN
Maybe later I ask again.
CUT TO
BACK OFFICE – LUNCH
Megan finally arrives in the lunchroom. She has had a busy morning.
SALLY
All our delivery men are in love with you.
MEGAN
Other than our clients, they are the only men in my life.
SALLY
Why don’t you put a personal ad in the paper?
MEGAN
I couldn’t do that. I wouldn’t know what to say.
SALLY
We’ll all write it together. It’ll be fun.
LINDA
Don’t tell the truth. Nobody will answer.
ANNIE
As soon as I wrote I liked motorcycles, I got plenty of answers.
HARRIET
I’ll ask Shelley what to say -
LINDA
Make sure you say “financially secure.” Of course they lie.
CATHERINE
If I was in the market, I would do it.
LINDA
And don’t mention the kid.
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S CAR – DAY
Megan is driving to a restaurant for a lunch date.
VOICE OVER BY MEGAN
So I made the decision to get out and find someone. I was finally ready. I had no idea of how many frogs there were out there and how hard it was going to be to locate one measly prince.
CUT TO
INT. A RESTAURANT — DAY
Megan enters an upscale restaurant. There are flowers on the tables and cozy red leather booths. She looks around for HENRY, her lunch date. Henry approaches Megan and they sit down at one of the booths.
VOICE OVER BY MEGAN
My lawyer, Sidney, fixed me up with this date. He told me his client, Henry, was a really nice guy.
MEGAN
So you know Sidney. He’s been our attorney for years.
(to the waitress who is standing by the table)
I think I’ll have the tuna salad plate and a Diet Coke.
HENRY
That sounds good to me too.
MEGAN
Why don’t you start by telling me a little about yourself?
HENRY
Well, I was born in Iowa. No, wait a minute. I want to back up and tell you how my parents met. That’s an interesting story.
Time lapse. The tuna salad is served.
HENRY (CONT’D)
My mother always favored my brother and I think that probably contributed to my emotional problems.
Time lapse. The tuna salad has been eaten.
HENRY (CONT’D)
I almost skipped telling you about my kindergarten teacher, Miss Curtis.
Time lapse. The Diet Coke is finished.
HENRY (CONT’D)
Chicken pox was the worst, unless you want to count the tonsillectomy.
MEGAN
(to the waitress)
No, I’m fine. I’ve had enough Coke.
HENRY
My first date stood me up. Why do women do things like that?
MEGAN
(interrupting)
I have to get back to the office. Say hello to Sidney. And thanks for the lunch.
HENRY
You’re a wonderful conversationalist.
As Megan beats a rapid retreat, hold on an adjacent table. The ghost of Julius is sipping a martini and has been eavesdropping the whole time. Danny is with him. He calls after Megan.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
How can you leave now? He’s only up to age 16.
Then, he turns to Danny.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS (CONT’D)
She’s wasting her time. She’ll never replace me.
DANNY
What’s so great about you?
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
It’s none of your damn business but - I am the perfect husband. A wonderful lover. Romantic.
DANNY
I suppose you gave her beautiful gifts and flowers.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I always bought her the most beautiful card in the store.
DANNY
(incredulously)
A card? Whoopee!
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
It’s the thought that counts.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MAIN OFFICE
Megan hurries into the office. Sally’s nieces are busy with coloring books in the back office. Otherwise, it seems very quiet.
MEGAN
Did I have any calls?
SALLY
Not one person. I hope you don’t mind that my sister dropped the kids off. Her sitter didn’t show up.
MEGAN
Of course not.
SALLY
How was your date?
MEGAN
Don’t ask. I hope we get better results from the personal ad. It comes out this week.
CUT TO
INT. A SPORTS BAR — NIGHT
The TV is BLARING with the Bulls game. Megan approaches CHUCK, a young muscle man, who is drinking a beer at the bar. He has answered Megan’s ad. He is wearing a blue shirt.
MEGAN
Are you Chuck? I’m supposed to be meeting a man in a blue shirt.
CHUCK
The one and only. Hey, are you Megan?
Cool baby. You rock.
MEGAN
There must be some misunderstanding here. I thought you’d be older.
CHUCK
Well, I didn’t say. I figured you might not come. I’m into older women. Hot ones.
MEGAN
I was expecting someone a little more mature.
CHUCK
You like the Bears?
MEGAN
Yes, I like them.
CHUCK
OK, baby. We are set. We’ll go to the game on Sunday. You lucked out tonight, baby.
MEGAN
I can’t go on Sunday. I have to go to a concert.
CHUCK
Who’s comin’ in?
MEGAN
It’s Bach.
CHUCK
I love Bach Turner Overdrive!
(He starts singing “Takin’ Care of Business…”)
The ghost of Julius and Danny are sitting at the other end of the bar. Julius is drinking a martini. He calls after Megan as she leaves.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
If you like him, you could adopt you, you know.
CUT TO
INT. THE COFFEE SHOP AT BORDERS BOOKS — DAY
Megan is having coffee with a WIDOWER from her personal ad.
WIDOWER
Yes, it was sad. I loved my wife. 20 wonderful years. Until she died
(tearing up)
– Halloween night. We were so close. It is very hard to be alone.
MEGAN
Halloween? Boy, that was just a month ago.
WIDOWER
Well, I did say I was a recent widower.
MEGAN
I’m just thinking back to when you answered my ad. I think it was four weeks ago.
WIDOWER
It is tough to be alone.
The ghost of Julius and Danny are sitting at an adjacent table having coffee. Danny is reading Variety. Julius is leafing through a book called, Journeys Out of the Body.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
His wife must be spinning in her grave.
DANNY
She was glad to get rid of him.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY- MEGAN’S OFFICE– DAY
Sally comes into Megan’s office. STAN is waiting to see Megan.
SALLY
There’s a man outside who wants to see you. His name is Stan.
MEGAN
Stan? Oh. Stan. OK.
Stan comes in.
STAN
I wanted to tell you what a great time I had the other night.
MEGAN
Yeah. It was alright.
STAN
I thought maybe we could go out on Friday night. Or Saturday or Sunday.
MEGAN
Stan, I don’t think this is a fit between us.
STAN
Look, I just don’t go around buying dinners for people. It cost me forty bucks.
Megan reaches behind her for her purse and hands Stan the money.
MEGAN
Here. I’ll give you a complete refund.
Stan hesitates, then takes the money and puts it in his pocket.
STAN
I’ll give you a call in a week. Maybe you’ll change your mind.
MEGAN
Don’t call.
The ghost of Julius and Danny are standing in the office and have been listening to the conversation. He turns to Danny.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Where do these creeps come from?
CUT TO
INT. AN ELEGANT RESTAURANT IN DOWNTOWN CHICAGO — NIGHT
Megan is having dinner with a distinguished looking OLDER MAN at the International Club, an elegant private restaurant in the Drake Hotel. They are seated by a window overlooking the lights on Lake Shore Drive and the city.
MEGAN
I know it must is painful for you, but this is our third date and I’d like you to tell me a little about your late wife.
OLDER MAN
My late wife? My wife is very much alive.
MEGAN
You’re married? It took three dates to tell me?
OLDER MAN
Yes. But I have an arrangement with my wife.
MEGAN
I’m not comfortable with that.
OLDER MAN
Give it a chance. My wife is going to love you. We’ll take you on beautiful trips around the world.
MEGAN
Trips? You’re going to take me on trips? I’m in the travel business.
Megan grabs her purse and stands up.
MEGAN (CONT’D)
If you want to impress me, you and you wife are going to have to buy me a Mercedes SL500.
And as she walks away -
MEGAN (CONT’D)
Yellow. With a black convertible top and air conditioning.
The ghost of Julius and Danny are having dinner nearby. As Megan exits, they give each other a high five!
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME – BATHROOM– MORNING
Megan is putting on her makeup. Alex stands in the doorway.
ALEX
Mom, I know it’s lonely for you without Dad around.
MEGAN
It is, Alex.
ALEX
I’m a little worried about some of the men you are seeing. Do you know anything about them?
MEGAN
(ignoring the question)
I always met them in a public place. And I always drive my own car.
ALEX
Still, I want you to be very careful, Mom.
CUT TO
INT. DEN — MORNING
Megan is having her morning coffee in the den. She has a pad and she is writing a letter to GOD. She prays out loud.
MEGAN
All That Is, God. Whoever You are up there. If You are up there.
I need a miracle.
Send me a man I can love. Let him love me.
God! Are You out there?
I need a miracle.
The ghost of Julius, in a brocade robe, walks in from the kitchen with his coffee. Danny follows on his heels.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
That’s a waste of time. There’s not one damn person up there who listens.
DANNY
They listen. They listen. But you got to be reasonable.
CUT TO
EXT. LAKE MICHIGAN SHORE — DAY
Megan is jogging along the lake with Arlene
MEGAN
So far, the newspaper ads are not working. Maybe Linda is right. There is no one out there.
ARLENE
Why don’t you come with me to some of the personal growth groups I attend? We could meet someone there.
MEGAN
I’ll try anything.
The ghost of Julius is jogging along behind them.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Why don’t you try to grow up?
CUT TO
DEN — DAY
Megan is listening to her VOICE MAIL messages in answer to the personal ad.
VOICE MAIL
You have three messages. To hear the first message, press one.
Megan presses one.
MESSAGE
Hello beautiful. This is HARRY. I read your ad and I loved it. We are perfect together. I like everything you like. Can’t wait to hear from you. My number is 555 228 4090.
Megan writes the number down with a smile.
VOICE MAIL
You now have two messages. To hear your next message, press one.
Megan presses one.
MESSAGE
This is Harry. I left you a message earlier. I was surprised I had not heard from you. We are perfect for each other. Please give me a call at 555 228 4090.
VOICE MAIL
You have one message. To hear your message, press one.
Megan presses one.
MESSAGE
This is Harry. Who the hell do you think you are? You think you are too good for me, right? Look, Miss Snob, I’ll get you for this. Call me. You have the number.
Megan drops the phone on its base abruptly. Hold camera on her horrified expression.
The ghost of Julius is sitting on the couch reading his newspaper. He looks up at Megan over his glasses.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Are you done with this or do we have to wait for Jack the Ripper to answer your ad?
FADE OUT
ACT 5
FADE IN:
INT. A BOARD MEETING ON THE OTHER SIDE — DAY
Fade up from a white screen to a conference room. Pan a group of shadowy white figures who are sitting around a table with a white tablecloth. Danny is sitting at the table in his battered, old hat. The Chairman addresses him.
CHAIRMAN
We want to apologize, Danny. We made a mistake giving you Julius for your first case.
DANNY
That’s OK. It’s good practice for me.
CHAIRMAN
Julius won’t grow and be happy if he remains earth bound. We’re thinking of sending in a replacement. Someone more experienced.
DANNY
No, please. Give me a chance. I want to do it.
CHAIRMAN
OK, Danny. We’ll give you a little more time. But not much longer.
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME- KITCHEN– DAY
Alex is leaving for his classes.
ALEX
Are you going out again tonight, Mom?
MEGAN
No, I’ll be home. Why?
ALEX
It’s pretty weird to have your mother dating all the time.
MEGAN
I’m taking a break right now.
ALEX
Good. I was hoping I wouldn’t have to see any of those guys at breakfast.
The ghost of Julius has been listening to the conversation.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Over my dead body. They were all losers.
Danny walks into the kitchen.
DANNY
Nobody is a loser. We are all just playing our parts.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I thought I told you to scram, loser.
DANNY
And every single scene is important to our movie. And to each other’s movie. It’s a jigsaw puzzle.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
How come they let you come back?
DANNY
If I can’t bring you in, they will send in a heavy hitter.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I have things to do here. I am not leaving.
DANNY
I had less aggravation when I was booking comics into the Catskills.
CUT TO
INT. A PSYCHIC’S OFFICE. — DAY
Arlene has taken Megan to see a PSYCHIC. Megan is sitting in a dark room across from him. He is wearing a turban. His eyes are closed.
PSYCHIC
Give me a moment to connect.
(pause)
Oh, yes. My guides are showing me your husband, Julius. You are attached by a silver cord. He is floating above you.
MEGAN
He is not floating. He’s at home. He’s in the office. He follows me everywhere.
PSYCHIC
We must tell him to go to the light. There is love there for him there. He must let go of his earthly life. The silver cord must be cut.
MEGAN
Look, I’m willing. I’ve asked him to leave. He won’t go. How do we cut the cord?
PSYCHIC
I’m going higher. I am asking my angels now.
(longer pause then his eyes pop open)
This is more difficult that I thought. They are telling me you BOTH are holding on to the cord. We need several sessions to work on this.
CUT TO
INT. ARLENE’S CAR — DAY
Arlene is waiting for Megan outside the office in her car. They drive off.
ARLENE
So did he tell you when you were going to meet someone?
MEGAN
We never got to that. I just paid $100.00 for him to tell me Julius was still around. Like I didn’t already know.
ARLENE
That’s all he said?
MEGAN
He said something about having to cut a silver cord.
The ghost of Julius is sitting in the back of the car. Danny is with him.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
That guy in the turban is a nut. Don’t give him any more money.
DANNY
He’s right. Even with your resentments, you two are holding on to each other.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
That’s bull. We love each other.
DANNY
The lesson on earth is when a relationship is over, you move to the next experience. She won’t grow unless she takes over her own life. And neither will you.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I am growing. I have things to make up to her. I’ve been too hard on her.
DANNY
It’s too late for this time.
CUT TO
INT. MEETING ROOM IN A HOTEL –WHOLE LIVING FORUM MEETING — NIGHT
There is a sign outside a large room reading “FREE INTRODUCTION TO WHOLE LIVING FORUM HERE.”
CUT TO
MEETING ROOM
Megan and Arlene walk into a large room and take seats. There are over a hundred people in the audience. The WORKSHOP PRESENTER is at the podium. He is dressed in blue jeans and a sweatshirt.
MEGAN
(laughing)
Do you think this will help us find a good man?
ARLENE
Maybe we’ll learn it’s not so terrible to be a woman without a man. Shhhh. It’s starting.
WORKSHOP PRESENTER
Welcome everyone. Are you ready for a new life?
The crowd is quiet.
WORKSHOP PRESENTER (CONT’D)
OK. I’m going to ask you again. Are you ready to change your life? Let’s hear it loud and clear!
CROWD
(SHOUTING)
Yesss!
WORKSHOP PRESENTER
Here is some shocking news for you. Listen carefully. NOTHING that has happened in your life up until now matters. NOTHING! You’ve been HIDING behind old, destructive “stories.” EVERY ONE OF YOU IS SIMPLY SURVIVING rather than BEING ALIVE. Are you ready to start LIVING?
CROWD
(shouting)
Yessss!
Megan and Arlene are leaving after the presentation.
ARLENE
So what do you think?
MEGAN
I think we should sign up.
The ghost of Julius is following them out of the room.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
More money going out to snake oil salesmen. All this self-improvement junk and nobody improves.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MAIN OFFICE–MORNING
Megan is coming into the office. The whole staff is standing around Sally’s desk. She is on the telephone.
SALLY
Yes, I want him paged. It is urgent. Mr. Edward O’Malley. He is at the Mexicana boarding gate to Ixtapa.
CATHERINE
I thought it was the right city.
SALLY
He is going to the Ixtapan Spa outside of Mexico City. Ixtapa is 600 miles away.
LINDA
Everybody makes mistakes.
HARRIET
This is what Shelley told me. This is why he said people were booking on the Internet. Shelley says -
Catherine sits down and covers her eyes.
CATHERINE
I want you to know that my intentions were of the very finest.
SALLY
The Ixtapan Spa is on the top of a mountain. Where did you think they would put an airport?… Hello. Hello. Have you found him? … They found him.
Catherine looks up, relieved.
CATHERINE
Actually, I was wondering where they would put an airport.
SALLY
Oh, Mr. O’Malley. There has been a tiny change to your flight arrangements. We have found a more direct way to get to the spa. Go to the ticket agent and pick up a new ticket to Mexico City.
(pause)
Yes, this is a much faster way…. Oh, you are entirely welcome. Have a wonderful time now.
MEGAN
Wow! That was a squeaker! Good work, Sally.
Catherine is now crying loudly.
CATHERINE
This has been such a terrible day.
MEGAN
It’s OK, Catherine. It’s been solved.
CATHERINE
It’s not only this. Blackie is being operated on for cancer. I took him in this morning.
CUT TO
EXT. MICHIGAN AVENUE – CHICAGO — DAY
Danny is following the ghost of Julius down Michigan Avenue. They stop to look at the window display at Tiffany’s.
DANNY
What are we doing here?
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I’ve decided cards are not enough. I’m going to buy something nice for Megan.
DANNY
You can’t make things up to her. You’re dead.
CUT TO
INT. TIFFANY’S ON MICHIGAN AVENUE – DAY
They enter the store. The ghost of Julius approaches a salesman.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I’d like to see something in diamond earrings.
The salesman does not look up.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS (CONT’D)
Excuse me. Did you hear what I said? I want to see some diamond earrings.
The salesman walks away. The ghost of Julius looks at Danny. He realizes the salesman can’t hear him.
DANNY
Let’s go, Julius. You’ve got to give up. This life is over.
CUT TO
EXT- OUTSIDE A THREE FLAT APARTMENT BUILDING – LATE AT NIGHT
A police car, a paddy wagon and an ambulance, all with lights flashing, are in front of the building. One of the policeman is Eric. He and another policeman are taking Nick, who is handcuffed and struggling, out of the building and pushing him into the paddy wagon.
ERIC
Get in there, you creep. You can’t keep beating women up. You’ve got an arrest warrant out on you for the last one.
Linda speeds up in her car. Two paramedics are carrying Annie out on a stretcher. They open the back door of the ambulance. Linda runs over to her. Eric follows.
ERIC (CONT’D)
I think she’s okay but we’re taking her to the hospital to make sure. Are you the one who called us?
LINDA
Yes. She called me at home. She was hysterical and said she was hurt. What happened?
ERIC
This guy has a record of assault a mile long. He won’t be bothering her or anybody else for a long time. You can bet on that.
Linda takes Annie’s hand. She is lying on the stretcher and crying softly.
LINDA
I’m going with you. You’re going to okay, Annie. I’ll be right here. I’m with you.
She climbs into the back of the ambulance with Annie. It leaves with the siren BLARING.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MAIN OFFICE – MORNING
The women are standing around the water cooler with Linda as she tells them what happened. They are all visibly shaken by the news.
LINDA
She was lucky. It could have been a lot worse. Nothing’s broken.
MEGAN
After that black eye, I was afraid of something like this.
Catherine is teary.
CATHERINE
So many bad things are happening. Blackie with cancer. And now Annie. What can we do for her?
SALLY
We’ll support her. The whole team.
MEGAN
You were so good to her, Linda.
LINDA
Women have to help each other. We’re all we’ve got.
CUT TO
INT. A COURSE IN MIRACLES WORKSHOP — HOTEL MEETING ROOM –NIGHT
Arlene has taken Megan to a large Course In Miracles workshop. The FACILITATOR is reading from the text of the course.
FACILITATOR
If we really understand this passage, it could change our lives.
(reverent pause)
FACILITATOR (CONT’D)
“Nothing outside yourself can save you. Nothing outside yourself can bring you peace.”
Megan and Arlene are having coffee at a break.
MEGAN
I love this, Arlene. It really speaks to me.
ARLENE
I know. I’m so glad you like it.
CUT TO
JOSEPH is a Robert Redford look-alike. He is walking out of the crowd toward Megan. She sees “lights” all around him.
JOSEPH
Well, hello there. I saw you come in. My name is Joseph.
Megan is flustered.
MEGAN
I’m Megan. And, oh, this is my friend, Arlene.
Joseph nods at Arlene and then turns his full attention back to Megan. His smile is dazzling.
JOSEPH
I heard you volunteer to attend one of the follow up groups.
MEGAN
Yes, I’d like to. Are you?
JOSEPH
Definitely.
DISSOLVE TO
INT. A MEETING ROOM AT THE COMMUNITY HOUSE — NIGHT
There are several GROUP MEMBERS at the study group of A Course In Miracles. The meeting has ended and they are sitting at a round table having cake and coffee.
ARLENE
I think it’s hard to meet people who are compatible. I’ve been divorced for three years.
JOSEPH
I’m not ready. I’ve been divorced only six months. I’m on a year sabbatical from teaching and I want to write – and have some fun.
FEMALE GROUP MEMBER
When you are supposed to meet – there he is.
MALE GROUP NUMBER
I met my girlfriend in a grocery store. We had the exact same items in our carts. I took that as a sign.
MEGAN
Suppose you meet someone and you see lights all around him?
FEMALE GROUP MEMBER
I would think that was a sign!
JOSEPH
I know what I’m looking for, I don’t want any more mistakes.
MEGAN
What are you looking for?
Joseph looks directly at Megan with a little smile as he answers.
JOSEPH
Someone not too young. Pretty. Smart. Independent. A little crazy but basically a down-to-earth woman who can cook.
The ghost of Julius arrives in time to hear the end of the conversation.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Don’t expect much cooking around here – unless you want to count take out in the microwave.
CUT TO
THE FRONT HALL
The group is leaving. Everyone is hugging good-bye.
ARLENE
See you all next week. It was great.
Joseph and Megan are the last ones to leave. He gives Megan a long hug.
JOSEPH
We ought to get together for dinner sometime.
Megan, not able to hide her excitement, answers almost too quickly.
MEGAN
I’d would love that.
They stand there an extra moment just smiling at each other. There is clearly electricity in the air.
CUT TO
EXT. CAR WASH — DAY
Four men are wiping the Lincoln down after it has been washed. The ghost of Julius is walking around the car inspecting the job. He points, with his cigar, to a spot that needs attention. One of the men stops, looks up at the sky, shrugs – and then goes over and rubs the spot with his cloth.
Megan is on her cellphone talking to her sister, June.
MEGAN
My car is almost ready so I’ll call you later. But June, THIS is the man I have been waiting for. This is the ONE, June.
(turns to the men as she gets in the car)
Thanks, guys.
The ghost of Julius is sitting with Danny in the back seat as she drives off. He flips his cigar ash out the window. Danny is fanning himself.
DANNY
Keep that window open. Don’t you know second hand smoke can kill you? I told them I wanted a non smoker.
The ghost of Julius opens The Wall Street Journal and looks up over his half-glasses at Megan who is driving.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
What do you mean, the ONE? This guy is the biggest jerk yet!
FADE OUT
ACT 6
FADE IN:
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY — MAIN OFFICE – MORNING
Catherine is walking into the office carrying a large box. Megan is standing by Sally’s desk in the front of the office.
SALLY
What’s in the box, Catherine?
CATHERINE
Blackie.
Linda looks up from her computer.
LINDA
You brought a cat to work?
CATHERINE
He is too sick to stay home alone. He’ll be no trouble. He just lies there.
And then, tearfully -
CATHERINE (CONT’D)
Is it okay, Megan?
Megan hesitates, glances in the box and turns away looking pained. She answers, kindly.
MEGAN
It’s okay, Catherine.
INT. A RESTAURANT– NIGHT
Joseph and Megan are having dinner and drinking Chianti in a local Italian restaurant with checkered red tablecloths.
JOSEPH
I’m glad you could make it at the last minute. I hate eating alone.
MEGAN
I’m pretty spontaneous.
JOSEPH
I like that.
MEGAN
You said you have studied the Course for years.
JOSEPH
Yes, it has really helped me over some rough spots. The divorce. And I have a little problem with depression. It comes and goes.
MEGAN
I can’t believe how honest you are.
JOSEPH
It’s funny. As soon as I met you, I knew I could tell you anything.
CUT TO
EXT. MEGAN’S HOME. — A SATURDAY MORNING
Joseph is ringing the BELL at the front door. Megan goes to the door.
JOSEPH
Is Alex here? I thought it would be nice to meet him and talk about philosophy.
MEGAN
He sure is. Come on in.
CUT TO
DEN
Joseph and Alex are in the den reading together and talking intently.
CUT TO
KITCHEN–LATER
Joseph has left. Megan is cooking. Alex comes in to the kitchen.
ALEX
He’s a nice guy, Mom. Did you know that Joseph has a Ph.D. in philosophy?
MEGAN
Yes, I did. You like him?
ALEX
He’s cool. Really smart. He can come around whenever he wants.
Megan smiles.
CUT TO
EXT. JOSEPH’S CONVERTIBLE –DAY
Megan and Joseph are riding in Joseph’s convertible. The top is down. It is a beautiful, sunny day.
JOSEPH
I think my brother divorced his wife because she refused to serve rutabagas with turkey.
Megan throws her head back and laughs.
MEGAN
I ALWAYS serve rutabagas with turkey.
JOSEPH
(playfully)
How did I know that about you?
The ghost of Julius and Danny are riding in the back seat.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I don’t know who writes this guy’s material, but it stinks.
DANNY
I wish they’d put the top up. That wind is murdering my sinuses.
CUT TO
INT. THE FIELD MUSEUM — DAY
Megan and Joseph are viewing SUE, the dinosaur at the Field Museum. Joseph is imitating the skeleton’s stance. Megan snaps his picture. They both crack up laughing. The ghost of Julius and Danny are watching.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
(sadly)
She hasn’t laughed like that with me for a long time.
DANNY
What do you think happened?
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I don’t know. I got too serious about life.
CUT TO
EXT. LAKE MICHIGAN SHORE — DAY
It is a breezy, sunny summer day. Joseph and Megan are running along the lake path at Oak Street beach. They are backdropped by the panorama of the skyline of Chicago.
MEGAN
I’ll race you to the beach.
JOSEPH
I’ll give you a head start. Go.
He quickly catches up with her. Then they stumble and laughing, roll over together on the beach by the water. He holds her, looking at her intently.
MEGAN
Are we in a scene from “From Here to Eternity?”
JOSEPH
There are no waves.
MEGAN
We don’t need waves.
Joseph kisses her. Then, pulls back and sits up.
JOSEPH
God, I wish I was in love with you.
MEGAN
Maybe you are.
Hold as they explore each others’ expressions.
The ghost of Julius and Danny walk up to the couple on the beach and look down on them.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
(disdainfully)
Please.
CUT TO
EXT. MICHIGAN AVENUE– EARLY EVENING
A balmy evening. Joseph and Megan are strolling along The Magnificent Mile on Michigan Avenue. They are holding hands. They stop to admire a red dress in the Neiman Marcus window.
JOSEPH
That dress is you.
MEGAN
It’s beautiful. I bet it’s expensive.
JOSEPH
Come on. I am going to buy you that dress.
MEGAN
Are you kidding me?
JOSEPH
No. Come on. It’s got your name on it.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Make sure you get her the shoes that go with it, cheapskate!
CUT TO
INT. THE TRAVEL AGENCY – BACK OFFICE– LUNCHTIME –
The women are arriving into the lunchroom. They sit down and start unwrapping the deli sandwiches which have been delivered.
HARRIET
How sad about Blackie dying. Catherine is devastated. I wonder when she’ll come back to work.
LINDA
It’s only a cat, for God’s sakes. And it was 18 years old.
Annie is sitting with a sling on her arm.
ANNIE
You just don’t get it. Blackie was her family. She’s all alone in her house now.
Linda considers this and looks thoughtful.
LINDA
It’s pretty sad when you can’t even count on a male cat.
Megan arrives in the room. She seems to be very distracted lately. She sits down and opens her sandwich.
LINDA (CONT’D)
Megan, what have you heard about the new Princess ship? Megan? Are you listening?
Megan suddenly comes back to earth.
MEGAN
Oh, I hear it’s beautiful.
SALLY
Leave her alone. She’s in love.
ANNIE
I was like that. I just hope she doesn’t get hurt.
LINDA
She probably will.
The women go back to their desks. Megan and Annie are about to leave when Eric arrives in his uniform, hat in hand.
ERIC
I just wanted to check in on you, Annie. How are you feeling?
ANNIE
I’m better, Eric. That is so nice of you. I appreciate all your help.
ERIC
Let me know if you need anything, OK?
Eric waves and leaves the office.
MEGAN
Now, there’s a good guy.
ANNIE
There were a lot of good things about Nick too.
MEGAN
Everyone has good in them. But when there’s more bad than good, we have to move on.
CUT TO
INT. THE RITZ CARLTON HOTEL IN CHICAGO– NIGHT
Joseph and Megan on sitting on a couch in front of a fireplace in the Ritz Carlton lounge. Joseph has his arm around her. She is wearing the red dress he bought her. A piano is playing nearby.
MEGAN
That was a wonderful dinner.
JOSEPH
God! You look beautiful in the firelight.
MEGAN
It’s my new dress.
JOSEPH
No, it’s you. You have the most intense eyes. Sometimes I feel like you can see into my soul.
MEGAN
(teasingly)
I can. So, be careful.
JOSEPH
I know you would never hurt me. That is so important to me.
The ghost of Julius is stoking the fire in his white dinner jacket. Danny is with him. He turns to Megan.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
You’re not buying this crap, are you? Somebody give me a break here.
JOSEPH
I have a little surprise for you. I hope you will like it.
MEGAN
What?
Joseph reaches into his pocket and pulls out a key.
JOSEPH
I booked us a suite here.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I can’t watch this.
Megan and Joseph leave happily. The ghost of Julius and Danny sit down on the couch.
DANNY
Well, have you had enough?
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
How could she do this to me, Danny? I never thought she’d cheat on me.
DANNY
She’s not cheating. You’re dead. Remember? If you really love her, why would you want her to be alone?
Danny’s cell phone is ringing.
DANNY (CONT’D)
I know. I know. Don’t be so impatient. I think he’s coming around.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I wish you would stop talking to those people on the phone and just talk to me.
DANNY
The Higher Ups are in on this now. They said to tell you it’s time for you to come home.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I don’t have a home anymore. I’m miserable.
DANNY
You would be happy on the other side.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I wouldn’t have Megan.
DANNY
You don’t have Megan now.
(then, more kindly)
But, you will be with her again. Someday.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Are you sure about that?
DANNY
Guaranteed.
CUT TO
INT. A SUITE AT THE RITZ CARLTON– NIGHT
Joseph and Megan enter the suite. Camera shots of the luxurious living room and the view at night of Lake Michigan out the window. Megan is walking around – visibly shaken with the thrill of it.
Joseph takes her hand, leading her.
JOSEPH
They include a bedroom with the price.
DISSOLVE TO
The bedroom of the suite. Joseph removes the red dress and places it on a chair.
DISSOLVE TO
LOVEMAKING
DISSOLVE TO
AFTER SEX.
The couple is lying in bed. Joseph is stroking her hair.
MEGAN
I love you, Joseph.
JOSEPH
I love you, Megan. You are so important to me. You’re like my family. Like the sister I never had.
Megan sits straight up in bed with a surprised look.
CUT TO
INT. THE HEALTH CLUB — DAY
Megan is on the stairmaster. The ghost is standing in front of her wagging his cigar at her. Danny is with him.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
That guy is taking you for a ride. I don’t want him to hurt you.
MEGAN
You are trying to sabotage me.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Look, I want you to be happy. I’m even willing to look out for someone for you.
MEGAN
I have someone.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
He’s wrong. He’s using you.
MEGAN
I love him, Julius.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
He doesn’t love you.
MEGAN
Go away. Let me be happy.
The ghost of Julius and Danny are walking away.
DANNY
You got to stop interfering.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
That bum is going to break her heart. You talk to her. Do something.
DANNY
She has to find her own way. We all do.
EXT. MEGAN’S HOME– NIGHT
The doorbell is RINGING. Megan answers the door in her bathrobe. Joseph is standing in the pouring rain. It is 10 PM.
JOSEPH
I hope I didn’t wake you.
MEGAN
No, not at all. I was just watching the news. Come in. You’re all wet.
JOSEPH
I feel very depressed tonight.
CUT TO
DEN
They sit down on the couch. Megan puts her arms around him.
JOSEPH
I don’t know how I made it without you.
MEGAN
You don’t have to make it without me.
JOSEPH
Look, would it be okay if I stayed here tonight on the couch?
MEGAN
Sure. I’ll get you some pillows and a blanket. We’ll talk in the morning.
CUT TO
MEGAN’S BEDROOM
Megan is in bed. There is a TAPPING on her door. It is Joseph. He is holding his pillow.
JOSEPH
I’ve got a bad case of the jitters. Can I just lie down next to you?
MEGAN
Come on. Get into bed.
She pulls back the covers. He gets into bed with her.
JOSEPH
You always make me feel so safe.
Joseph puts his arms around her and falls asleep immediately. Megan is wide awake listening to the rain.
CUT TO
The ghost of Julius and Danny are standing in the hall outside the bedroom. Julius is upset.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
That guy is sleeping in my bed!
DANNY
How many times do I have to tell you? You don’t have a bed here anymore.
CUT TO
INT. KITCHEN — THE NEXT MORNING.
Megan and Joseph are having breakfast.
MEGAN
Joseph, you seem to be going through a bad time right now. Why don’t you stay with us for a while?
JOSEPH
What would Alex think? Although, I could sleep on the couch in the den.
MEGAN
He would think it was fine.
He likes you.
JOSEPH
(eagerly)
I’ll go pick up my computer and some of my things. I always feel so much better when I’m with you.
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME -UPSTAIRS OFFICE — DAY
Joseph is sitting at the desk. His computer is open in front of him. He calls Megan at the office.
JOSEPH
I’m not coming to the meeting tonight. I’m going to a movie.
DISSOLVE TO
MEGAN AT THE TRAVEL AGENCY
MEGAN
Okay.
DISSOLVE TO
JOSEPH AT HOME
JOSEPH
Look, Megan, don’t mention that I’ve been depressed and staying with you. I don’t want the group to feel sorry for me.
DISSOLVE TO
MEGAN
I won’t. I’ll see you later then.
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME – FRONT HALL — AFTERNOON
Alex walks in the front door with his books. He fishes one book out of his backpack, drops it on the stairs, throws his coat on the banister.
CUT TO
KITCHEN
Alex opens the refrigerator and takes things out for a sandwich. Then he remembers he has to call someone and picks up the kitchen phone. As he is about to dial, he hears Joseph’s voice on the extension.
CUT TO
UPSTAIRS OFFICE
The lights are dim. Joseph is speaking on the telephone in hushed tones.
JOSEPH
I’ve been in London for two weeks doing some research. I miss you too. I’ll be home by this weekend. Look, I have to hang up. Bye darlin’.
He hangs up the phone and calls downstairs.
JOSEPH (CONT’D)
Is that you, Alex? Aren’t you home early?
ALEX
Yeah. A lab got canceled. But I’m leaving again. You can go back to your call from London.
Hold on Joseph’s face. He’s been caught.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MEGAN’S OFFICE — DAY
Alex walks into his mother’s office.
ALEX
How long is Joseph going to stay with us?
MEGAN
I don’t know exactly. Why?
ALEX
He ties up the phone lines. He’s always talking on one line and his computer is connected to the other.
MEGAN
I thought you liked Joseph.
ALEX
He’s okay. But I am starting to develop my own philosophy. People are not always what they seem to be.
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME – OUTSIDE – EVENING.
Megan is arriving home after work. She pulls her car in the driveway next to Joseph’s car. Joseph is loading his computer and some suitcases into his car. It is snowing.
Megan jumps out of her car.
MEGAN
Where are you going?
JOSEPH
It is time for me to get back to my own place, Megan. I need to be quiet and do some writing.
MEGAN
Were you just going to leave without telling me? Just like that?
JOSEPH
Of course not. I wrote you a note. I’ll call you. Or call me.
Joseph is pulling out of the driveway. Megan shouts after him.
MEGAN
Your phone is always on voice mail.
He doesn’t hear her. He is gone.
The ghost of Julius and Danny have been standing in the snow in the driveway. He turns to Danny.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Good riddance! I hope this fad is over.
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME – KITCHEN — NIGHT
The Course In Miracles study group is arriving. Arlene is in the meeting room kitchen with Megan setting up the coffee.
ARLENE
Is Joseph coming tonight?
MEGAN
I don’t know. I hope so.
One of the women from the group is talking to another in the hall as they arrive.
WOMAN GROUP MEMBER
Joseph won’t be here tonight again. He called me from London. He’s been there for two weeks doing research.
Megan and Arlene look at each other quizzically.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MEGAN’S OFFICE– DAY
The door is closed. She is talking to her sister June on the telephone.
MEGAN
I haven’t heard from him and his phone is on voicemail as usual.
(long pause)
I’ve decided to write him a letter. I want a commitment from him. But, oh God, June. Suppose he turns me down? I’ll die.
(pause)
At least then I will know. But I don’t think he will. This man is in love with me.
Megan sits at her desk and writes a long letter, seals it and walks out.
SALLY
Where are you going in such a hurry?
Megan is beaming.
MEGAN
I’m going to mail a letter and then I am going shopping.
CUT TO
INT. VICTORIA’S SECRET — DAY
Shot of Victoria’s Secret storefront and then inside -
Megan is looking at a diaphanous white robe – then a black nightgown. Then some black underwear. She is checking out with the cashier.
CUT TO
INT. BLOOMINDALES — DAY
Shot of Bloomindales sign at the mall on Michigan Avenue.
She is holding up red satin sheets. She rubs her face in the pillowcase dreamily. The ghost of Julius is watching her.
Megan is paying for the red satin sheets.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Are you kidding me? With the way you keep house? Who’s going to iron satin sheets?
FADE OUT
ACT 7
FADE IN
INT. MEGAN’S HOME – DEN –SUNDAY
Megan has her coat on and is leaving the house. Alex is studying in the den.
MEGAN
I’m going over to Arlene’s house. I’ll be back about four o’clock.
ALEX
Okay.
MEGAN
Do you have her telephone number?
ALEX
Somewhere.
MEGAN
I am writing her number down and leaving it right by the phone.
ALEX
Okay.
MEGAN
In case of an emergency.
ALEX
You mean in case Joseph calls. You know, I think he’s a player, Mom.
MEGAN
Don’t be ridiculous. Let me know if he calls right away.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – BACK OFFICE
Lunchtime.
CATHERINE
Isn’t Megan having lunch?
ANNIE
She says she isn’t hungry.
HARRIET
Maybe she’s coming down with something. Shelley says everyone in his office is sick with something.
CATHERINE
She’s grieving. I know what that’s like. Has she heard from Joseph?
SALLY
Take a look at her face. Can’t you tell he hasn’t called her?
LINDA
That bastard. They’re all bastards.
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME – HALL – NIGHT
Megan has come home from the office. She is still wearing her coat as she picks up the mail from the floor at the front door. She opens a letter and reads it.
MEGAN
Damn! I don’t believe this.
Alex is coming down the stairs.
ALEX
Believe what?
MEGAN
Sidney sent me a letter of apology he got from the Veteran’s Administration in Washington and a $400 invoice for legal services.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MAIN OFFICE — DAY
Megan is leaving the office. She talks to Sally from the front door.
MEGAN
I’m running over to American Visa Service. I should be back in an hour.
SALLY
Okay.
MEGAN
You have their number over there?
SALLY
Yes, we have the number.
MEGAN
Call me if I have any messages, OK?
SALLY
We’ll call you right away.
CUT TO
EXT. LAKE MICHIGAN SHORE — DAY
Megan and Arlene are jogging along the lake. It is a cold, gray day.
ARLENE
You just can’t wait by phones night and day. He’s a smart man. If he want to see you, he’ll find you.
MEGAN
You’re right, Arlene. It feels good to get out in the air. I’m glad you pushed me.
CUT TO
INT. THE TRAVEL AGENCY- MEGAN’S OFFICE — DAY
Joseph is walking into Megan’s office. She is on the phone with a client.
MEGAN
- Let me check to see what’s available and I’ll call you later today. Bye.
(hangs up the phone)
Hello, Joseph.
Joseph closes the door and sits down.
JOSEPH
That was a beautiful letter.
MEGAN
Thank you.
JOSEPH
You know I wouldn’t hurt you.
MEGAN
I hope not.
JOSEPH
I thought I had made it perfectly clear to you that I was not ready for a relationship.
MEGAN
We already have a relationship.
Joseph gets up and walks over to Megan.
JOSEPH
I just want to be friends, Megan. I can’t handle the responsibility of a commitment.
MEGAN
I can’t just be your friend.
JOSEPH
I was thinking we should plan a workshop on a ship. A spiritual seminar at sea. Wouldn’t that be fun?
Megan stands to face him.
MEGAN
I don’t want to be your travel agent.
JOSEPH
Let’s pretend you never wrote the letter. I want you back the way you were before.
Joseph pulls her to him and holds her. She is crying now.
JOSEPH (CONT’D)
Please don’t cry, Megan. I love you. But like a sister.
Megan pulls away and pushes him.
MEGAN
I am not your sister. Leave now. Just go.
The ghost of Julius and Danny are standing in the corner of the room. He turns to Danny.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
(sarcastically)
Very touching. What an asshole.
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME – DEN– NIGHT
On the telephone with her sister June. Megan has been crying. The ghost of Julius is sitting on the couch carefully lighting his cigar.
MEGAN
Well, at least I know. I feel like someone died. And that someone is me.
(pause)
No. I can’t just be his friend. I can’t go back to the way things were.
The ghost of Julius gets up to turn on the TV evening news. He turns to Megan.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Did I or did I not tell you this guy was a bum?
Megan starts crying again.
MEGAN
Go away. Just leave me alone.
CUT TO
INT. VICTORIA’S SECRET — DAY
Megan is returning the gown and the black underwear at the cashier’s counter.
CUT TO
INT. BLOOMINDALES REFUND COUNTER — DAY
Megan is returning the sheets to a SALESPERSON. The ghost of Julius is with her.
SALESPERSON
Do you have a receipt?
MEGAN
I can’t find it. Can’t I get a refund without it?
SALESPERSON
I can give you a refund but we have a sale. With no receipt, I can only refund you at the sale price.
MEGAN
OK. I still want to return them.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
This is a perfect example of why I never had money.
MEGAN
SHUT UP!
CUT TO
EXT. OUTSIDE A SALVATION ARMY STORE — DAY
Megan gets out of her car and walks into the Salvation Army store carrying the red dress in a plastic garment bag.
Megan comes out without the dress, gets into the car and drives off. The ghost is in the back seat.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
You gave a perfectly good dress away? It had a lot of wear left in it.
CUT TO
INT. MEGAN’S HOME – KITCHEN — NIGHT
Megan is preparing dinner. Alex is sitting on a stool in the kitchen with her.
ALEX
You mean Joseph won’t be coming over anymore?
MEGAN
No. I broke things off with him.
ALEX
How can you just give up a friend?
MEGAN
It’s heartbreaking, Alex. Maybe when you get older you’ll understand.
(she is crying now)
Alex comes over to her and hugs her.
ALEX
Please don’t cry, Mom. I’m still here.
Megan goes back to stirring a pot on the stove. Sniffling.
ALEX (CONT’D)
Mom?
MEGAN
What?
ALEX
You’re not going to start talking about us moving again, are you?
MEGAN
No, Alex. We’re staying right here. This is our home.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY -BACK OFFICE–LUNCH
The women are opening cartons of Chinese food and putting out paper plates.
CATHERINE
I know how you feel, Megan. I don’t know how long it’s going to take me to get over Blackie’s death.
MEGAN
Death is different. When someone dies, the hope for reconciliation is gone.
SALLY
And if the person is still here?
MEGAN
There is always that little secret thought that someday – someday – he’ll wake up and say, “What? – Was I crazy? I love her.”
They are passing around the cartons of food.
LINDA
What about the secret thought that he comes back and you get to say, “Get lost, buddy. You’re screwed. It’s too late.”
The phone is ringing in the outer office. Linda gets up to answer it.
ANNIE
I sometimes hope there is a psychologist in the prison who will help Nick with his anger problem.
SALLY
Please.
The doorbell RINGS. Sally gets up to greet a client. Annie calls after her.
ANNIE
I said sometimes, Sally. Not much.
CATHERINE
Maybe we have to listen to what people tell us and believe them.
HARRIET
I always listen to Shelley.
Linda returns to the lunchroom.
LINDA
A man will tell you three things in the first 20 minutes.
CATHERINE
What?
LINDA
He’ll tell you if he went to Harvard, if he belongs to Mensa and if he wants a relationship.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MEGAN’S OFFICE –DAY
Megan is meeting with her accountant.
ALAN
You have to make a difficult decision here.
MEGAN
I know, Alan. I’m thinking about selling the agency.
ALAN
Selling? That’s not what I had in mind. Megan, I’m sorry to tell you the agency is not salable.
MEGAN
We still have a lot of clients.
ALAN
No one buys a small company that has been in the red for three years. You’ve been carrying it with your own money.
MEGAN
You’re not suggesting I close the agency, are you?
Alan stands to make his point.
ALAN
Yes, I am afraid I am. The day of the small, neighborhood travel agency is over. Your lease is up in two weeks.
MEGAN
What would I do with myself? What about my staff?
ALAN
(kindly now)
Save yourself, Megan. Your staff will make their own way.
MEGAN
I have to think about this.
ALAN
Your lease is up. Think fast.
Alan get up and leaves with his papers. The ghost of Julius has been standing in his white dinner jacket with his cigar in his teeth. He walks forward and wags his cigar at Megan, scattering ashes all over her desk.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
There is nothing to think about. You heard what he said. Just get out! It is time for you to grow up!
She stands up behind her desk and faces the ghost of Julius.
MEGAN
I am grown up. And it is time for you to listen to your own advice. It’s time for you to get out.
HOLD on the ghost of Julius. He is looking with surprise at a coiled silver cord in his hand. One end has been cut. Then he looks back at Megan.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
What’s this?
CUT TO
MEGAN
I’ve cut the cord. Good-bye, Julius.
Danny struggles into the room carrying two bulging suitcases.
DANNY
We’re done here, Julius. Let’s go. And stay right behind me this time.
Megan is sitting quietly at her desk now. She looks exhausted but peaceful.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Not so fast, buddy. I have something to say to this lady before we go.
(he swallows hard)
Megan, I know I have been a burden in your life and even in this half-life I’ve been in – but I want you to know I love you and I’m sorry. Danny says we’ll be together again someday. I’m going to make it up to you. I promise.
DANNY
She can’t hear you anymore, Julius.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
She can’t?
DANNY
No. But love is always heard by the heart. So, she knows.
THE GHOST OF JULIUS
I’m going to find a way to get back here. You’ll see.
DISSOLVE TO
INT. A BOARD MEETING ON THE OTHER SIDE — DAY
Fade up from a white screen to the conference room. Danny is sitting at the table. The Committee is CLAPPING.
CHAIRMAN
Good work, Danny. We have a new booking for you. But I’m warning you. This is tough one.
DANNY
You don’t let a person sit down for a minute in this place.
CUT TO
INT. TRAVEL AGENCY – MAIN OFFICE – MORNING
Megan has called her staff together for a meeting.
MEGAN
– so I have no choice. We close in two weeks. Please complete the trips you have immediately. If you need time off to interview for other jobs, take it. We’ll cover for each other.
(pause. Megan’s voice catches)
Like we’ve always done.
There is silence.
FADE OUT
FADE IN
EXT. A SIDEWALK UPSCALE RESTAURANT IN DOWNTOWN CHICAGO – ONE MONTH LATER — DAY
The office staff is together for a farewell lunch. It is a unseasonably warm, sunny day. The women are seated at a round table under a festive umbrella. The WAITER is passing out menus.
VOICEOVER BY MEGAN
The office is now officially closed. Sally took her nieces to Walt Disney World and is starting a new job in a large commercial agency next week.
SALLY
My favorite story is the woman who insisted that I book her on a driving vacation from one Hawaiian Island to another.
VOICEOVER BY MEGAN
Harriet and Shelley are still discussing what she should do next.
HARRIET
- what about the group that canceled because I never told them a cruise was on a ship – Shelley couldn’t believe it.
VOICEOVER BY MEGAN
Linda finally got her big divorce settlement and is taking a World Cruise on the QEII.
Linda looks up from the menu she is studying.
LINDA
- don’t forget the parrot that shrieked obscenities on Delta all the way to Florida!
VOICEOVER BY MEGAN
Annie is going back to teaching kindergarten. She is dating Eric, the policeman now.
ANNIE
I’ll never forget how good all of you were to me.
VOICEOVER BY MEGAN
Catherine has applied to the Peace Corps.
CATHERINE
Everyone helped each other. There was so much love in the office.
She takes out a handkerchief and wipes tears from her eyes.
CATHERINE (CONT’D)
We even loved the customers.
Suddenly, the waiter comes to the table with a bottle of wine for Megan.
WAITER
The gentleman at the next table has sent it with his compliments and his card.
The GOOD-LOOKING MAN smiles and raises his glass to Megan. She smiles back. The women look at him and then back at her with approving glances.
Lunch is over. The waiter is bringing the bill to the table.
VOICE OVER BY MEGAN
A few months ago I would have jumped at the chance to meet a guy like that. But not now. Maybe later.
Megan is signing the check and the women are gathering their things to leave.
VOICE OVER BY MEGAN (CONT’D)
I replaced the roof. I’m looking for a small, reliable car - and this year I will decide what flowers I want in my garden – and about everything else.
Megan stops on the way out to say thanks to the attractive man.
MEGAN
What a nice thing to do.
The good looking man stands to greet Megan.
GOOD-LOOKING MAN
It looked like a special occasion. You have my card. Why don’t you give me a call sometime?
MEGAN
Maybe I will.
CUT TO
EXT. MICHIGAN AVENUE – DOWNTOWN CHICAGO –DAY
The women are walking arm in arm down Michigan Avenue. The crowds on the sidewalk part to let the happy group pass on this beautiful, sunny day.
VOICE OVER BY MEGAN
In the meantime, I’m finding out – it is not so terrible to be a woman without a man.
The women continue walking, laughing and stopping to look in store windows as they go. They stop at a cross street to let an ambulance, sirens BLASTING, go by.
CUT TO
EXT. NORTHWESTERN HOSPITAL EMERGENCY ROOM ENTRANCE — DAY
Two attendants are rushing an obviously pregnant YOUNG WOMAN on a stretcher out of an ambulance into the emergency room.
YOUNG WOMAN
(screaming)
It’s coming! The baby’s coming!
Two nurses meet them and quickly wheel the patient into a cubicle.
CUT TO
A CUBICLE IN THE EMERGENCY ROOM
A baby is shrieking. The NURSE puts the infant into the arms of the young woman.
NURSE
It’s a girl!
YOUNG WOMAN
(exhausted but beaming)
Oh, look at her! Isn’t she beautiful!
NURSE
What’s her name?
The young mother looks intently at her new baby.
YOUNG WOMAN
We’ve thought of a lot of names, but now that I’ve seen her I’m going to call her Julie.
Hold on close up of baby who is still screaming.
VOICEOVER OF THE GHOST OF JULIUS
Danny! What kind of a screwed up deal did you negotiate here? Danny! Where are you? There’s been a terrible mistake! Danny! For Godssakes! Where the hell are you?
Copyright 2009 – Corinne Edwards and Paul Van Name
WGAw reg# 1387971
{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
Corinne…I just finished reading this screen play and I laughed at so many junctures. I think Susan Sarandon would be wonderful in the part of Megan. I loved it when the old guy asked her to dance and she said “You dance?” and he said “It’s a slow one”. That made me laugh out loud.
I’m amazed at how your words created a visual image of the story you were telling so that my brain thinks I went to the movies and watched it instead of reading it. Good Job Girlfriend…and here we thought you were just good at blogging.
O and by the way, I tried to buy the book but even though it was listed on Amazon, at the “check-out” it came up as “unavailable”. So I guess the last few have been snapped up. Anyway, from this movie lover…I give it two thumbs up!
Sharon Beck
Dear Corinne, I,too, just finished reading your screen play, and truly
enjoyed it. It’s true as Sharon says: I had my images of places you
described quite clear in my mind, the dialog was wonderful and when is
the picture coming out? I don’t know if I would have the patience to
do what it takes to write a screen play…..no I’m sure I wouldn’t. Any
takers yet? Good luck! Love, Louise
Corrine – You brought your book to life! Even Julius had a face! I know your character (Megan) so well that I could feel and picture her by reading her dialogue. I picture an actress such as Sharon Gless (hair dyed red), Bette Midler or Susan Sarandon. The actress would have to be spicy and quick-tongued. I loved it!
PS. The character of Linda reminds me of somebody we both know.
Who knows? Yes, you are Linda. You were a lot nicer than her but the story is similar.
I think it would make a good movie. People are getting sick of blood and gore and might enjoy a real stoty.